


Wreaking Havoc Against All Odds

by krakenking



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: One Shot Collection, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Harm, pls help me i can't stop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-20
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 06:42:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 41,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7256602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krakenking/pseuds/krakenking
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of Roadrat oneshots based on lyrics from songs that came on shuffle in my iTunes. A kind of writing exercise, if you will. <br/>Pls excuse this small sample of my music taste, there are just some things that u can't deny urself of ok</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Trooper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And as I lay there gazing at the sky  
> My body's numb and my throat is dry  
> And as I lay forgotten and alone  
> Without a tear I draw my parting groan.
> 
> -The Trooper by Iron Maiden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A more metaphorical take on the lyrics u.u

They were alone in the wasteland of what was left of Australia, hidden among debris that might once have belonged to some buildings as it made a good temporary shelter from the elements that threatened to be the demise of their survival at every waking moment. The night was quiet, adding to their already fried nerves after a day of avoiding most other people that only sought them out for their own gain and agendas, a sort of fucked up game of tag where if they were caught, no good would come out if it, as they found out time and time again whenever they found themselves in danger. The only thing giving away their location was the dwindling smoke from a fire they had made hours ago to roast some food they had managed to trade for with some goods of their own. As the smoke drifted from a shattered window into the outside world and vanished in the shadows, avoiding the moonlight entirely, the two men were busy trying to figure out the night watch schedule. 

Chatting away, the younger and scrawnier of the two tried to make his case to avoid the first shift, arguing that he was tired, exhausted, aching, and the head injury he received during a fight that he “unintentionally” started meant that he deserved to rest. Besides, maybe both of them should get some sleep, he could set up traps all around their little bunker that they made, and good ones too; mines covered up with dirt and sand and hidden bombs strapped tightly to some walls (as if he hadn't done all of that already). No one would be the wiser if they decided to investigate, so they might as well both try to get some shut eye. But the much larger man only grunted and shook his head. He had been the one to drive them around everywhere, he had been the one to take all the shots thrown at his charge during the fight after he intervened, he never got a chance at a beer, and while he knew it was his job to watch and look after the other man, he just really couldn’t take anymore, he was completely drained. Besides, the head injury could be dangerous and he was worried that it might end up deadly if his boss went to sleep, which ended up convincing the other to suck it up and get it over with. It would only be until the moon started to go down, which would give him some time to go over their supplies and figure out what was needed, weaponry wise. 

Grumbling as his companion of about a year now settled down for the night, he made his way through the dilapidated building, avoiding his own clever traps and resenting the coolness of the night as it only made his omnic parts of his body hard to tolerate. He liked sleeping on his right arm, but if the metal was too cold, then it would just bother him, and his left arm didn’t seem to offer the same support. Annoying as it was, he knew that there was really nothing that he could do to improve his situation. What had happened, happened, and to some extent, he thought that these parts of his body were better than before, giving him advantage over others sometimes, especially his spring peg leg, although it managed to break all the damn time if he landed on it wrong. Useless pieces of scrap. 

Once he made himself comfortable by putting down a moth eaten blanket on the dirt for him to lie back on after taking off his beloved spike and explosives ridden tire, he crossed his arms behind his head and crossed his feet. This wasn’t exactly keeping watch as keeping an eye on the sky meant fuck all out here, but it was still something that connected him to a time before, when radiation hadn’t poisoned the landscape, creating an apocalypse of just left overs that survivors had to fight and fend over. It wasn’t fair. He could have grown up differently, maybe even grow to like the Omnics, but no. They were basically handed the land after a sort of peace treaty was attempted and look at the consequences. No, even if the omnium fusion core hadn’t blown, he would still hold the same hatred and coldness for the buggers. They didn’t deserve to be treated like humans. They were machines that had learned to talk and manipulate anything they wanted, which seemed mostly to be people, that was all. 

But...his family would still be alive. He might have had to live with Omnics (if they didn’t overrun the humans), but he would be doing so with his mother and father and brothers and sisters and cousins and aunts and uncles and whomever else that comprised of people close to him that he had known or imagined to have known. He kind of always wanted a large family. Maybe that had been the case, he just couldn’t remember anymore. His parents were able to survive the blast, but succumbed eventually to radiation poisoning, leaving him alone with some of his so called friends to live with. Never being able to keep up with them that well in basically everything. Always considered the runt, even when he grew to be taller than all of them. Then he found that stupid fucking thing and he had shown it off to a select few that he thought he could trust, then boom. Everyone suddenly paid attention to li’l Jamison Fawkes, the poor nobody that no one could tolerate. Too obsessed with the wrong things. Too out there, too loud, too talkative, can’t ever shut up, why can’t you just shut up for once, no wonder you don’t have any friends, you just can’t ever stop talking.

Too...different. From the others. In bad ways. 

Then he found Roadhog...well, after asking around to those that would answer him. To those that didn’t know who he was yet. They were probably cursing themselves now that they let him go unharmed and without giving them something that he absolutely owed no one. After having to give up so much, he was keeping this one thing, this one bloody thing that absolutely no one had the right to touch or grab or “ask” or bribe for. Except for the man that he now shared almost everything with, voluntarily. Long as they kept to their agreement, his bodyguard kept him safe from everything that he could. His limits knew almost no bounds save for keeping the ravaging thoughts that haunted his mind when he didn’t keep himself busy. Like now. 

He was doing it again. Almost letting salty droplets of water spill slowly from his eyes. Soon as he caught himself in the act, he wiped away the wateriness of his eyes and pushed any thoughts and memories of the past back into their place when they really didn’t have a place to begin with anymore. That was then, this is the fuckin’ present mate, get it together. And get some water too, you're dehydrated, that's what's goin' on, stop the burnin' in yer throat. He was a grown man who was living with someone he trusted, someone that was going to be there for him through thick and thin. Yeah, okay, so he had to pay him, but there were times where what they had shared had been absolutely priceless. And he didn’t want to think about the day when they were bound to finally split up for good, either by Roadhog getting tired of him like everyone else, or if Roadhog died, or if he died, or if something just didn’t go right. He didn’t know what, but something could. 

Emotions are dumb and unnecessary, he told himself, knitting his brows together in thought. No more of this shite. Sit up and look for any signs of danger, that’s what you’re supposed to be doin’, not any of this soft bullocks. That’s how you get killed, by letting your guard down. The time to mourn for his past life and the man that he once was needed to be over. It wasn’t just a want, it was a basic survival need, ever since the moment he came across something significant that would make him just as significant in return. He was the only person in the world with this thing and this knowledge. That made him powerful. He was in control. 

He slapped himself then shook his head to clear everything. The head injury must be getting to him, of course he was in control. Who said anything about not being in control? Who the heck did they think they were talkin’ to? 

Junkrat had stopped bleeding from the cut on his head after the fall in the fight he got himself into a couple of hours ago, but he still picked at it, hoping to reopen up the wound. It was giving him something to do, something else to feel. A different kind of pain, more tolerable and more understandable. Soon, he was back to thinking and even feeling more like himself again, and he made chitchat with himself until the early morning when he realized that Roadhog needed to be woken up. As he picked up his gear, he looked up at the sky one last time, narrowing his eyes. Just once he would like to look at it without going through the motions that left him fighting for an identity. He knew exactly who he was now. The old Jamison Fawkes was dead and buried, and maybe not fully forgotten, but he knew for sure that it wouldn’t be long before he was successful in getting rid of the old all together. 

If at first you don’t succeed, try blowing it up again. He grinned just thinking about it, then jogged back into their shelter, making as much noise as he could to get ol’ lard arse up and functioning, he had overslept, what a poor excuse for a bodyguard. The plan was to take on the new day with as much energy as possible, there was so much to be done, and definitely something to be blasted into hundreds of pieces before noon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, but like, I know what songs are coming up, so some of these are gonna be serious and others are gonna be fun and on the verge of shitposting
> 
> Im dying already


	2. Hollaback Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let me hear you say this shit is bananas  
> B-A-N-A-N-A-S  
> (This shit is bananas)  
> (B-A-N-A-N-A-S)
> 
> -Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AKA THEM BEING FUCKING IDIOTS AND TEASING WINSTON

Sometimes, if they got bored and bold enough, they would play pranks the others in Overwatch. Of course after a while a lot of their teammates caught on to when and what it might be they were planning on doing, but when it came to Winston, even Tracer got excited to see what kind of joke would happen to her friend. Long as it was harmless, eventually everyone would have a good laugh over it. Eventually. 

They were smart enough to know that his glasses were off limits, no matter what. Even if they had given Winston hints ahead of time, they were scolded and given an earful about never ever, EVER touching his glasses, and Reaper had to agree...he had crushed his glasses one time and it had not been fun watching him go from angry to down right frenzied. Winston needed his glasses to see, so don’t ever touch them, or so help them, he would crush their spines without a second thought. Roadhog had a hard time believing that his spine could be crushed by the stupid monkey, but Junkrat would easily not only be paralyzed, but might actually end up getting his scrawny arse killed, and it wasn’t a nice situation to think about. But other than that, they didn’t really have limits.

So when everyone got an invitation to hear Lúcio’s new album at a private release party, the two of them got to scheming yet again, this time hoping to mess around with the music choice as well as watch Winston lose his mind on the days leading up to it. 

It started out small. At first, Winston didn’t notice because he still wasn’t taking his diet Athena had set up for him seriously, so a few missing bananas weren’t a big deal. They kept on stealing them until finally, he realized his supplies were low and he couldn’t figure out what was going on. He would just have to go out and buy more then, but how in the world did he go through that many bananas? Especially since it seemed he was replacing them more often now, at a rather annoying pace. Maybe he really was starting to like them. There also wasn’t a reason for him to review video footage set up around the base even though Athena kept on asking him to, but when asked why, she wouldn’t really give him a good answer other than Junkrat and Roadhog were up to something. Far as he knew, those two were set on ruining Lúcio’s party and had nothing to do with him, so he ignored her and she stopped trying to get him to pay attention. It didn’t seem like anything anyways, maybe they just had developed a sudden craving or weren’t getting enough to eat. 

By the time they had enough bananas to start decorating the place Lúcio had planned on throwing the party, they managed to convince him to play one song, just one song that D. Va had played some time ago during a live stream she had them watch of her, and honestly, the Brazilian didn’t need to be asked twice if this was really what they wanted to do. How no one else thought of it was a mystery, but he was in if Junkrat promised to stop making fun of how short he was. It was an empty promise, but they all knew that anyways.

In the hours following up the release party, the rest of the bananas were gone. Winston had literally bought an entire bunch of them the day before! How did...oh. Someone was taking them, obviously. How did he not think of that before? He interrogated the people he thought were logical suspects: Tracer, D. Va, Reaper, and the two well known pranksters. All of them said no, and of course Junkrat and Roadhog were confused as to why they would want anything to do with some bloody yellow fruit, did he take a good look at what they ate most of the time? Winston had to suppress wanting to throw up; course he knew, and to think they could have touched his stash was illogical to begin with, nothing else was out of place and he couldn’t detect the distinct smell both of them gave off, a mixture of gunpowder, gas, and just general uncleanliness, but he just had to make sure. 

Soon, Lúcio had everyone to go to the room where he had set up everything needed to create a kick ass launch party exclusive to his teammates. The food was catered, but everyone was asked to bring something, even if it was something small, so that there was food for everyone. However, when Junkrat and Roadhog showed up with nothing in their hands, it was a relief that literally no one bothered to hide, insulting Junkrat just a tiny bit. Compared to what they had back in Aussie, what they had here was almost a bloody miracle. Roadhog had snorted something and he just rolled his eyes back. No, his bubble milk tea was his and his only, he wasn’t gonna share that for neither love nor money, thank you very much, ya drongo.

The music was fantastic, the rhythm and beat were too good to resist and it had everyone dancing in no time. Not only was this party supposed to be in support of one of their own, it was a good time for everyone to relax and bond with one another. Normally, Junkrat and Roadhog would find a way to sneak out, but when they hadn’t left by the fifth song on the track, the others were beginning to suspect that something was up. Oh, something was up alright, Junkrat snickered giving Lúcio the sign. 

Once the track had ended, the sound system started malfunctioning, and the speakers were starting to give off feedback. Everyone was too busy covering their ears to notice Junkrat and Roadhog make a break for it, but their absence from the scene when Lúcio managed to recover everything with help from D. Va wasn’t surprising. A sorry attempt then at ruining the evening, they might as well have just not have shown up if that was going to be it then. It was a little horrifying how much everyone had come to expect worse from them. 

For this next song, Lúcio made an announcement that everyone should dance in pairs, if they were gonna dance at all. Tracer immediately went to Winston’s side and dragged him to the middle of the room, eager to spend some time with him and while he tried declining her, he gave in since seeing her happy made him happy, and besides, they were having a fun time and the threat of anything else going wrong had left. 

In the middle of the song, Lúcio’s equipment again started to act funny until another song came on, one that not everyone recognized, but it got D. Va squealing and breaking out into uncontrollable laughter.

“What’s going on?” was the most popular question among all of them, but suddenly, bananas were raining down upon every single person while a song from the mid 2000’s blared loudly through the speakers, practically deafening all of them at the same time. It was bad enough that bananas were falling from the ceiling, but in the confusion of it all, a lot were crushed underneath multiple feet, creating a slippery and nasty substance that people kept sliding on. Not a single person in the room was able to stand for very long. The reaction was divided into fits of giggles about the absurdity of it all and absolute disgust for getting covered in filth that once used to be something delicious. 

Winston on the other hand, was just stunned. He stood where he was just completely dazed and confused as he put two and two together. 

“Aw, c’mon now Winny poo! Don’t tell us you didn’t see that one comin’! You’re supposed to be the smartest of the _bunch_! Eh? Get it?” Junkrat called out from above in the rafters of the ceiling. Still, Winson had no idea how to react. There was too much going on all at once from the loud, almost mocking song, to the people flailing and falling around him to the two idiots above him laughing their heads off that he didn’t know where to start.

“Oi Winston! Don’t feel too bad, we thought this might _a peel_ to ya! And hey! What do you call two banana skins?” 

All he could do was stare up at them in disbelief. This had to be a joke...well, of course it was a joke, but this had to be a dream of some sort. An awful nightmare that he couldn’t seem to wake up from. 

“A pair of _slippers_!”

That was it then. He had had enough! He was not letting them get away with this if it was the last thing he did. He needed to get them down from their and teach them both a lesson, but as soon as he took his first step, he slid forward too fast, causing him to fall flat on his face. 

“Hey, ‘Hog? Seems like now would be a good time to make like a banana and split, what do ya say to that?”

And that was how Junkrat found himself laying on his back, breath knocked out of him from the fall, nasty bits of banana all over him, and some pissed off people that could easily beat him up without his bombs taking their sweet time stalking over to him.

“OH COME ON ‘HOG, THAT WAS A GOOD ONE!” Junkrat yelled as his supposed bodyguard made a break for it. “Roadhog? Oh for-Hey, come back! ‘Hog you’re supposed to be protecting me from shit, ya bloody oaf, get back here!” 

Accepting his fate after yelling incoherently for Roadhog to come back, Junkrat curled up into a ball, just waiting for whatever it was the others had planned for him in revenge, hoping that at least it would be fast and swift punishment. He would remember this day, that was for sure.

Roadhog waited in their room until the little runt came in grumbling, covered in slime and while he hadn’t been roughed up too much, he did have some fresh bruises as well as gloves that he chucked off and threw into a corner. He had to clean the entire room with a few volunteers that managed to feel sorry for him, and he was not in the mood for anything else other than complaining and yelling at Roadhog for leaving him behind. That hadn’t been part of the plan, but Roadhog just couldn’t help himself.

“Seems like that shit was bananas, huh, ‘Rat?”

He had to admit, it was worth hearing the other scream in frustration and start wrestling with him, which they both knew was worthless as Roadhog quickly overpowered Junkrat with ease. Still, it had probably been one of their better pranks that they liked to look back on with fondness, although it took everyone some time before bananas were allowed in the facility again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You would not believe how loud I screamed when this song came on holy shit. I did another one shot based on some other lyrics, but how could I not take this opportunity????????? I had to u.u


	3. Old Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I take to the road like an old man  
> I cherish my time here alone  
> I process the lines of the passing lights  
> Losing myself, I change my plans
> 
> -Old Friend by Future Islands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit more focus on Roadhog this time

He had lost everything after what had seemed like a grand idea at the time; kill the omnium fusion core, be free of the wretched “sentient beings” that were nothing but things that wanted to take what they could through force. And while they didn’t take Australia by force in the regular sense, they took it through manipulation. Offering up basically the whole of Australia as a place for the Omnics in exchange for some peace had been a huge stab in the back for him and his fellow Outback dwellers that had chosen to occupy the space out there specifically to live their life without much trouble, and of course, to live a life of quietness. When the news came to his area, he and the others saw no other choice but to rebel and it was good at first, they were winning and they were going to take back their land and destroy all Omnics, and then...everything went to waste. Literally.

They had gotten what they wanted: their land back and the Omnics gone, but in return everyone had to deal with radiation fallout and learn to how to survive all over again in their new severely damaged environment. It had been slow at first, seeing the affects of the aftermath. At first it was just radiation poisoning; folks were dying at an alarming rate, growing sick with just nausea or vomiting, then having bowel movement problems, migraines, a fever...dizziness, weakness, fatigue...then hair loss, various bodily fluids becoming bloody, and any wounds they had would seem to never heal thanks to the slow healing rate. Unpleasant quick or slow deaths were normal to see for quite some time. Then the water became too contaminated to the point that out of desperation to get something drinkable, people began to dig until they hit pay dirt, but it wouldn’t be long before that water was contaminated too. Animals died off...food became scarce as the plants also withered away. 

Life will always find a way though. He and everyone else that had managed to survive thus far was proof of it. Mutations had begun to show up in both humans and animals alike. Some of the mutations seemed to have been beneficial; others like the increased deadliness of the already deadly species of Australia, such as the huntsman spider, were incredibly detrimental, and it was almost like the spiders were beginning to figure out how to hunt larger prey. Before you just had to worry about getting bit and not having proper aide to help you out. Now, you ran and didn’t look back. They seemed to like it when you did that; gave them time to determine how easy of a catch you were since you were so keen on keeping an eye on them. Roadhog could’ve sworn that they were also slowly growing bigger. It didn’t matter much to him, he could still stomp on them with one foot, and that was really all that mattered. 

When things began to settle again, he knew that he no longer could be the man that he once was. Couldn’t really remember who he was before the Australian Liberation Front single handedly caused the apocalypse. He knew due to his size that he had been an Enforcer, a person of influence, a protector. A person no one wanted to be an enemy of. He knew that he once had a family of his own, but all he had now was his chopper and his personalized gas mask that he owned as a joke. 

“Roadhog” had been his bike gang name, because he had to have such a large ride to accommodate him, and so Roadhog he truly became. He had been a pig farmer after all, in his past life. It didn’t take much for him to find a theme to go with, he had loved those buggers to death. Brought him good business and they were always so cute when they were young. Li’l piggies just doing their own thing, not a care in the world. Ah, those were the days. 

Junkertown wasn’t his home to begin with, but he had found it to be tolerable. No one liked to mess with him after he established himself as a man who took no shit, killing and harming anybody that got in his way, so he had a lot of power here, getting free drinks and being paid well to be a bouncer or guard for whoever offered up the best for him. He was an intimidating man, but soon it became time for him to find a new place to live. Oh, he was still going to live near Junkertown, he had to without a doubt keep doing so if he wanted to keep on surviving, but he needed a place to be alone. To be himself, somewhat. It was hard to tell what it was to be himself anymore. Was it to be Mako again? Mako Rutledge, part Kiwi, a successful pig farmer, favorable Enforcer, honest family man. Patriot to his country after the Omnic Crisis, slightly unwilling rebellion leader, a great influence to the cause...loner. A man that worked hard at home but when he went out with his mates, became someone else. Drunkard, fighter, chopper enthusiast. Those Enforcing skills kept him above the law. 

Maybe he had always been Roadhog. A giant of a man, weighing in at well over 40 stone, standing at 2.21 meters. Been made fun his entire life of for his love of pigs and how that related to his looks. Given the gift of a pig mask, but he didn’t know how to tell the guys that he actually really appreciated it without getting more shit from them. Now he would just hurt whoever said anything wrong to him, usually being in reference to bacon. Maybe kill them, who cared, he certainly didn’t. Not anymore. He was Roadhog. The large man that everyone knew to stay away from if they didn’t want trouble. The fat man that was hired for his demeanor. The quiet giant that did what you told him to do as long as you paid him. 

On some nights he dreamed. Not very often, no, he never dreamed very often, but when he did, all he saw were bright lights of different colors. Shapes mixing together or dissolving. Sounds either amplified or muted, but no matter what he could never make out what anyone or anything was saying. Could never tell what was going on, but he could feel the memories and he could feel the emotions. He would either wake up feeling overwhelmed and covered in sweat or wake up wanting to break the closest thing he could get his hands on. With time, the dreams had come to him less and less, but the raw emotions and the memory of having memories were still there in the back of his radiation filled mind. 

If you had told Roadhog that he would have been traveling the world with some kid that had found him through some odd means, he would have laughed in your face before shoving you away from him with force. It would have even brought tears to his eyes. No way was he ever going to be seeing the world again. Australia was his home, this is where he would be staying for the rest of his miserable life. No one was going to convince him to leave, there just wasn’t anything out there for him anymore. Besides, who could put up with him for very long? He could be incredibly obnoxious, blood thirsty, needed a lot of fuel both for himself and his chopper, and a different kind of stimulation to keep him interested, stuff that he could do because he could. Even when Junkrat came into his life and proved to be different from most people, Roadhog still had his doubts. No way was this partnership going far. He would be the one to get that treasure from the runt by pretending to get close to him, that was his one goal out of this deal. 

If you had told Roadhog that he would eventually grow to like the kid, heck, maybe even hold some fondness for him, you would have been knocked out then and there, possibly even tossed away like garbage for even thinking such a thing could be possible. Roadhog didn’t want to be attached to anyone. A partnership was good enough for him. Companionship...that was a different story. He had had friends. He had had strong relationships with people. He had had a family. No more. It wouldn’t be possible and he vowed for it to remain that way. 

Until he heard that laugh, saw the love in Junkrat’s eyes when something exploded, came to know the obsession to create things for the specific purpose of destruction first hand, found that it was disturbing to him when the gremlin didn’t talk for prolonged periods. Until he had almost lost Junkrat the first time during a robbery attempt gone wrong, he would have denied ever feeling anything but wanting to get paid and cause mayhem. His boss ended up causing a lot of problems for both of them, but it always worked out in the end somehow, and somehow he had grown to...tolerate him. Be willing to do things without getting paid. Travel the world with a partner that seemed to actually care about him, to make sure that he was just as protected as Roadhog protected him. 

“Best mates have each other’s backs, ya know? ‘s better that way, ‘cause if you can’t take care of yer best mate, what kind of friend, or even person, are you?”

That had gone round and round in Roadhog’s head multiple times after he heard it. What kind of friend, or person, was he? He didn’t know for sure, but it seemed that Junkrat did, and maybe he was a good person after all. You know, besides all of the murder and chaos that he loved to be a part of. 

So when Roadhog realized that he wasn’t just sticking around Junkrat for his fair share, that was when he realized that he had fucked up. Made an alliance with someone else...an actual companionship of sorts. Definitely not a best mate, probably, but close enough. Junkrat could really grate his nerves most times and his boss didn’t always make the best decisions, nor did he like taking the blame for himself when things went awry. No, probably not best mate, but a friend nonetheless. Junkrat was worth...getting hurt and arrested for. 

“What’re you lookin’ at, smeg? Go back to sleep and give me back the blankets, you’re hoggin’ all of ‘em, you...hog. Heh...”

Roadhog rolled his eyes and threw the blankets onto his partner, watching as the younger man slipped back into unconsciousness. Reminiscing time was over, that much was obvious. Maybe there was no explaining who Roadhog was, and maybe that was how he liked it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might be incoherent, I apologize. I'm literally avoiding studying for this last final of mine, but I think I might want to try to post daily, we'll see. Anyways, Future Islands is a hella good band, pls go check them out, they're so great, I seriously mean it


	4. Skeleton Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your love is out  
> But even despite it all  
> Give me your hand  
> Let's face this night and see it through
> 
> -Skeleton Boy by Friendly Fires

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess this includes an OC? welp

He had done something unforgivable. It had been mistake that he thought he would never make, and yet he had done it anyways. It had just slipped his mind, he hadn’t meant to just leave him there on his own, but he had thought that he had heard his boss following close behind him. Or perhaps he had just taken it for granted that he was there, just out of sight, running his crooked run, the best he could do with his spring peg leg that he refused to upgrade. Upgrading only meant getting closer to...them. A downfall for them both, despite their shared hatred.

Lately Junkrat had been sicker than usual; the built up dirt and dust that had settled in his lungs over the years were getting the best of him, causing coughing attacks that would last for hours. They were either just awful sounding, or awful sounding and pathetic and he would just sit there trying to comfort him, but comforting was something new to Roadhog; new as in something new to relearn, that is. Maybe a long time ago he used to be good with his words and used to letting people be physically close to him in more softer ways. It was a little foreign to him at first, but after a bit it seemed natural to just let the sick and exhausted kid curl up to him, as them touching appeared to be a huge help, and for the most part it did seem like it helped him calm down, especially when the attacks were really bad. Roadhog would lay there with him, listening to the other breathe, or try to, depending. He was a stubborn li’l bugger though, refusing to take more than his fair share of water, so sometimes he had to be convinced, usually through intimidation. If he didn’t drink up what was being offered to him, then so help him, Roadhog was gonna kick him out because he couldn’t stand to hear that repulsive hacking. Each time, Junkrat looked at him like a kicked puppy, looking at him in confusion and plain hurt, but it did the trick. He would always take that canteen of water and gulp it down as slowly as he could, trying not to give away how much of a relief it was to get his throat wet to clear out the thick green, wonky looking mucus that seemed to want to choke him to death. 

He had to go back for him, he was a bodyguard, it was his job to protect his ~~mate~~ client from the sudden barrage of attacks from fellow Junkers that had their own personal vendetta against Junkrat. When he located them all, he hid just in case, knowing that his boss could hold his own just fine, and maybe he was having too much fun fighting them off, maybe that’s why he fell behind without telling him. He loaded his gun, just in case. 

Junkrat was curled up into a ball on the floor, arms and hand covering his head and he was pleading for them to stop hitting him with their wrenches and other tools. They had managed to detach his omnic arm and he couldn’t see what they did to his leg, but he wouldn’t be surprised if that had been compromised too. All of his weapons had been tossed aside, and he could see that the other Junkers had come prepared for the return attacks as they had made shields to absorb the damage from the grenades and bombs launched at them. All they had to do was wait for Junkrat to run out or reload, and then it looked like they just overtook him through numbers. 

“For someone who’s name has the word rat in it, you certainly ain’t good at tellin’ us shit!”

“Oi! You bogans should know by now that I ain’t sayin’-Ow! Watch it! ‘m no good dead!”

“You’re no good alive either, ‘Rat! Ain’t that right, boys?”

The assumed leader kicked Junkrat’s stomach and made him turn over onto his back. Soon as his throat was exposed, he stuck a thick boot onto it, threatening to crush both his jugular and windpipe. Junkrat tried to pry it off, but he was too weak, even if he had the use of his other hand. Roadhog had never seen Junkrat give up before, but it seemed like he might have just then. Still...he had hope.

“We’re not askin’ again, ‘Rat. Yer bodyguard ditched ya, you’re useless without anythin’ on ya ‘cause you can’t fight at all, so you’ve got nothin’ left to lose. Be a good lad and tell us, Jay.”

“Fu-fuck-you, I ca-Oi, I can’t breathe, mate-”

That only made the man laugh as he pushed down harder, and the others watched with wolflike smiles, hungry to see more action, hungry to see what would happen to their old friend.

Roadhog had seen enough. He had wanted to wait to see if Junkrat had anything up his sleeves (metaphorically) but apparently they really had swiped away anything they could. It was time to go to work then. He cracked his knuckles and his neck and stormed into the room, walking at first, then before the men could register who he was, he charged. He backhanded the leader off of Junkrat as hard as he could, sending the man flying into the rocky wall, taking satisfaction in hearing the way his skull thunked against it. Creating a barrier between him and his boss, he pulled out his gun and began firing at will, not caring if he missed or not. The point was to scare them off so that he could reel them back in for more punishment. Two of the other Junkers died from his shrapnel bullets due to being at pointblank range while the others hightailed it out of there. The slow ones were hooked back in and taken care of easily with a few good hits to the head and chest. 

When it was over and he was back at Junkrat’s side, he saw that they had managed to damage his peg leg with some sort of trap they had set up. He would have been done for if hadn’t gone back in and he knew he was in deep trouble with the other man. To try and start the make up process, he picked up Junkrat’s omnic arm and helped him get it back on, then rounded up his weapons. Junkrat tried to fight against Roadhog the whole time, telling him to get away from him, he had already done enough, let him just...figure this one out on his own. He’d crawl back to their bunker if it came down to it, but there was no way he was gonna let him near him now. He didn’t need his sympathy or his pity, or anything else. He could get through this just fine on his own, it’s not like this was the first time someone tried to get him by targeting his physical weaknesses when he was alone. Roadhog cringed slightly at that, but let him do what he wanted. He would only pick him up if he was asked to.

He did manage to crawl successfully all the way to the sidecar (with a few stops for him to rest and cough violently, organic hand clutching at his throat like he was trying to physically keep it from opening up) and dragged himself into it, breathing heavily and sweating profusely to the point that his entire head was damp and his usually puffy, almost stiff hair was clinging to him, looking like wimpy little curly strings. His entire face, neck, and chest were a deep red from the effort, and he was radiating off an alarming amount of heat. When Roadhog went to check his temperature with the back of two fingers to his forehead, he weakly attempted to bat him away, but his energy levels were at their lowest they had been in forever it felt like. 

“So...what’s the verdict, Doctor Pig? Got anythin’ to cool me down with? I feel like me insides are cookin’ themselves past well done, and ‘s like I’m gonna burst into a bonfire, although that doesn’t seem like a bad idea, honestly. Then I really would be flamin’.”

“Might know a place and some people, if they’re still there. Might have to do some favors for ‘em in return, but if we don’t get you help fast, you could die, boss.”

“Eh, what else is new? Even me gorgeous body doesn’t want me to be alive anymore...guess I deserve it…think I might get some shut eye, things are gettin’ too fuzzy to focus on.”

Roadhog didn’t know what else to say, so he grunted in reply and mounted his chopper, revved it up, and raced away to a place that he used to know back in his old life. Far as he knew, those people never left, and they were skilled in healing anything that came to them, either through medicine or other means of an even older time.

It took them about two hours of driving through the desert before Roadhog came to a small village that looked as if it was abandoned at first, but he knew exactly where to look for the people he needed to see. The more abandoned and worn out a place looked, the more likely someone was living underneath it; logic stated that the less inviting it was, the more likely it was to avoid unwanted visitors. He just hoped that he was still welcome in this small community; the last time he came around these parts things had been much different. 

Carefully, Roadhog took Junkrat into his arms and carried him to the first residence. After knocking and waiting for several minutes, he was about to move on to the next place when a rickety side door opened to reveal an older woman. On her chin and lips were distinct tattoo markings and soon as he saw the staff that she used to help her walk, he took a step back, knowing that it was better if he was out of range of it. She might have looked like any other older woman, but time was nothing when it came to a warrior. 

“I thought we might never see you again after the last time you came by here. You are looking for help for your friend, are you not?”

He nodded and nudged Junkrat a bit to try and keep him awake. He got a glare in return, but he had perked up a bit at the sound of another person’s voice. His eyes were darting around again and he squirmed to try and see who it was, but Roadhog just squeezed him in a kind of warning and he stopped. 

“This is Anahera. She’ll help you, trust me on this.”

The older woman smiled warmly and stepped aside. “You’ve come a long way, stranger. Come now, tell us what is wrong.”

At the invitation, Roadhog brought his sick boss through the doorway and followed the older woman down into a basement that held her possessions in it. She got to work right away, getting out some medicine that she gave to Roadhog, and then moved on with some plants that she crushed up, producing an interesting aroma. He made sure to take a mental note of what the plants looked like in case he needed to make some himself. She showed Roadhog where to put him down and told them that he would need to take his prosthetics off, just for safety reasons. That didn’t sit well with Junkrat, but when he went to protest, Roadhog put his hand over his mouth and shook his head. Knowing that he was way over his head here, Junkrat complied and laid down, not saying a word, but his eyes were enough to speak for him. He was terrified of what was going on, and he couldn’t blame him.

“What happened to the others?” Roadhog asked. From what he could remember, there were about ten of them still in the area. From the looks of it, she was the only one left as there didn’t seem to enough supplies for the others, and there was only one sleeping cot. She answered him when Junkrat’s latest coughing fit stopped momentarily.

“They moved on. I chose to stay behind. This place holds some special memories for me that they do not know of,” She said curtly, not really in the mood for small talk. She kneeled down beside Junkrat and had him sniff at the plant remnants. He did so hesitantly, but it seemed to calm him down and soon he was out cold, his breathing slow and even. It was the first time in a while that Roadhog had heard him like this and it almost seemed too odd for him, but he trusted her. She had been doing this long enough, and she used to be close to his family before.

“What is his name?”

Roadhog shrugged and left it at that, knowing that she didn’t mean his nickname, or street name, or whatever it was that wasn’t his real name. Anahera sighed and finished tending to Junkrat and his wounds. From what she had to do, Roadhog knew why she had put him out. Usually when it was him that was tending to his boss, he either had him drink lots before, or told him that no matter what, he needed to suck it up. Wouldn’t have to be patchin’ him up if he just stayed out of trouble. Before she tried to coax him back into consciousness, she looked up accusingly at the large man. 

“He should be called the Skeleton Boy because he is too emaciated for his height. You keep him well fed, yes? He is your charge, you need to be taking good care of him.”

“Don’t know, but I’m trying,” he answered truthfully. He really didn’t as he still didn’t know how much Junkrat ate normally. “Gotta keep him alive or else I’m out of a job.”

“Yes, your job. He would benefit more if you were able to-”

“Our deal has nothing to do with friendship.”

“I see,” Anahera narrowed her eyes, giving him one last suspicious look before bending over to whisper in Junkrat’s ear. It didn’t take long before the kid woke up, blinking wearily, not remembering where he was. Soon as he saw her, he immediately became alarmed and yelped, getting up to back away from her, but forgot that he didn’t have his arm or leg on, so he just ended up in a mess on the floor again.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, you’re okay, dear. Tell me, what is your name?”

“It’s...Why do you wanna know?” He looked around and saw Roadhog. It took him a second to register that as well, but when he did, he tried to crawl over to him until it finally dawned on him. “Oi, Roadhog, who is...Oh...right. I remember. Sorry,” he looked up sheepishly at her and sat up using his good arm. “Uh...thanks?”

“Don’t thank me just yet, dear. I’ve given him your pills to take until the coughing stops as your lungs aren’t doing well on their own. I’ll also prepare some more aroma therapy for you, you seem like you could benefit from it.”

Both men watched her silently as she got up to crush more plants together after Roadhog had helped Junkrat get his arm and leg on again. The smell was stronger this time, and even with his mask to filter the air, Roadhog could tell why Junkrat went to sleep almost immediately. When he looked down at the kid, he had fallen back asleep. He shook his head to clear it and tried not to breathe too much as he still needed to drive. When she was finished, she found a container of sorts to put it in and gave it Roadhog to keep on him. 

“Usually there would be a price for this, but I think we both know this is the last time we’ll see each other, Mako.”

He didn’t reply, but picked up Junkrat and carried him back outside and plopped him into the sidecar. She trailed after them and waved as they left, a kind of sad look on her face, but she knew better than to ask him to stay. It never worked. Roadhog took one last look over his shoulder, waved back, and then turned his gaze towards the road in front of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SF Pride is tomorrow and I'm shaking with fear and excitement yAY


	5. In This City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now we're laying in a field  
> White flowers on our backs  
> Talking 'bout home  
> But we can't go back  
> I guess, that's why we left  
> So we could take a step  
> Keep moving and forget the rest
> 
> -In This City by Iglu & Hartly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't get Junkrat randomly wet if you know what's good for you.

These disguises were always the worst to wear. He had to wear an actual shirt and jacket, change into pants to help cover up his leg, change his boot to a sneaker, and keep his weapons (if he were allowed any) hidden and he couldn’t wear his bloody tire and Roadhog made him stand up straight and on top of everything, he had to wear a hat and sunglasses and gloves. Gloves. Full gloves were THE WORST because he couldn’t touch things with his actual hand and fingers and he had to wear them only because he needed to keep his omnic arm a secret while they were undercover, and he also couldn’t be leaving any fingerprints behind. Didn’t Roadhog know that he barely had fingerprints left anyways? The chemicals he worked with were brutal, and not all the black on his nails were polish, he just wore polish so that they would at least look consistent. Okay, and also hats just as bad, they always made his head itch something terrible and they felt weird and made him feel too warm, and sometimes he forgot that his hair was almost always on fire or smoldering so he would put them on and forget to put out the flames beforehand, because shouldn’t a hat just smother it anyways? And then his hat was on fire, and oh, things would just be a complete mess, and draw unwanted attention. Like maybe...now?

His new beanie had just burst out into flames and he sighed heavily, trying to think about what to do, ignoring the gasps and screams of horror from passersby as he continued strolling down the sidewalk near the next place they had planned on hitting up. _Why is your hat on fire?_ Someone would ask eventually. _Do you need help?_ Well yeah, maybe some help would be nice, his head was literally on fire, some help would be absolutely lovely at a time like this, thank you very much, you incredibly observant citizen.

Or even better, someone could just dunk water onto him without asking and get him soaking wet, then back away, stuttering an apology as he started to grow angry with them, slowly curling his hands into fists. Too fuckin’ late, mate, he was feeling a bit like ruining someone else’s day.

“Now see here, you magnificent bastard, you can’t just be throwin’ water where ever yer li’l heart desires, my friend!” Junkrat smiled, using his “civvie voice”, and pulled the man that had tried to help him by the collar and held him close by wrapping an arm around his shoulders, which was really the only place he could. Normally the waist was ideal when trying to keep someone from fleeing, but he was too damn tall do to that with the people around here, what was their deal, looking almost like anklebiters. “I’ll have you know that I have a guy that takes great care of me and doesn’t like it when others wanna mess around, know what I’m sayin’?”

“Uh…No?” 

The man was shaking with fear and he was desperately trying to figure a way out of the situation, but Junkrat refused to let him off easy. It fueled him even further and he was about to continue on, but a huge hand on his shoulder made him think twice about it. And if the man wasn’t afraid before, he sure as hell was now. Junkrat might have been taller than him, but Roadhog was towering over both of them, and he did not look happy, even with his own disguise covering up his face.

“Jesus…”

“Nah, that’s just Ro-erm, Rowan? And he ain’t close to bein’ Jesus at all! Believe me, my friend, he is not close in the slightest,” Junkrat grinned, gripping the man’s lower jaw tightly and showed off his yellowed, sharp teeth. His breath must’ve smelled bad cos the man recoiled in disgust. Good. “Where I come from, the religious types seem to want to turn a blind eye. Ironic, ain’t it?”

“Let him go, Jay,” Roadhog said, squeezing his shoulder firmly. His voice was nice when it wasn’t as muffled by the mask, but he still hid his face with a scarf and huge sunglasses. Junkrat managed to catch himself before he shivered in delight from hearing his voice. There was just something about it that made him want to melt, almost as badly as that deep throaty, genuine laugh of his. It also just put him in a mischievous mood mostly.

“Aw, just let me play with him for a bit, Ro, he’s so cute,” Junkrat wiggled a finger underneath the man’s chin, just so happy to be making the other uncomfortable. It would be teaching him a lesson or two to think before he went out of his way to do something for someone else. “Whoever calls you darlin’ has made quite the catch, ya wayward git.” 

Roadhog squeezed again and he knew fun time was over. Ugh.

“Okay, Rowan, I get it, fine. Go on, ya punk, I’ll catch ya next time you decide to drench someone!” 

“I was just trying to help!” the panic and regret in the man’s voice was like music to his ears.

The two ex-Junkers watched in amusement as the man picked up the bucket he had used and fled from them, going back to his wife (or whatever the woman was to him) who had been watching from afar. Together, the couple looked back at them with complete disdain and turned their noses up, hurrying away. 

“Damn civvies...I hate the lot of ‘em. They’re so stuck up, no good, haughty, nasty, better than thou, absolute filth, Omnic lovin’, pieces of dung,” Junkrat took his beanie off and began to wring it dry. With each insult, he tightened his grip on his beanie until it started to come apart, the wool starting to stick out haphazardly.

“‘Rat. You’re doing it again.”

“Doin’ what again? I ain’t doin’ nothing to be gettin’ upset over, ‘Hog, jeez, calm down would’ya? I was just havin’ some fun with the guy that decided to get me wet. Can’t go around lookin’ like a drowned rat now, can I?” Junkrat grumbled some more as he finally shook the beanie out and tried to put it back on, but he had wrung it so hard that it had stretched out and covered the upper half of his face, earning a short chuckle from his bodyguard. Glad that he could be entertaining at a time like this. He pulled it up a bit to peek out. “Hey, how’s that plan comin’ along, huh? I saw a few security cams, but they’ll be easy to knock down, did you take tabs on the guards? ‘Cause I kind of sort of forgot to…”

“It’s a simple job,” Roadhog nodded before leading him away. They had finished scoping a place that had caught Junkrat’s eye and were going to head back to the hotel they were staying in to catch some shut eye before heading back out for night. They weren’t gonna hit it right away; they were still on the run from a city a couple hundred “miles” away, so they didn’t want to risk anyone getting too familiar with them too early in the game. They had agreed to attempt to lay low just to try and get some well needed rest and also just have some general downtime. 

“Aw, those ain’t any fun at all...but no job to big, no score too small, right?” he looked up and smiled, shoving his beanie away into his jacket pocket and Roadhog just ruffled his hair briefly in agreement. 

They walked in relative silence for a couple of blocks, Junkrat just humming contently and ignored the looks that they got. They must’ve made an odd pairing. One giant, burly man lumbering along with one tall, good lookin’, skinny chap that was was still soaked in water. His stomach rumbled just a notch louder than normal and he tried to ignore it but Roadhog didn’t. He stopped, looking expectantly at his boss. The people that were walking behind them walked around impatiently, muttering under their breath, but obviously didn’t want to attract their attention by as they didn’t say anything too harsh.

“Ah, roight. Okay, well are you hungry for anythin’, mate? I know the answer’s usually yes with you, but I’d figure that I’d ask, ya know, keep you from starvin’ to death. See, me I can probably go without anythin’ until dinner rolls around, but I know that you might need to refuel and there’s lots of options ‘round here, wanna go check things out?”

“…”

“Well, if that’s the way you’re gonna be about it then I guess we’re gonna go get some milk bubble tea-”

“Boba.”

“And whatever else it is that you want, my treat.”

Even with his heavily tinted sunglasses blocking his eyes, Junkrat could just feel the intensity of the judgement his bodyguard was giving him. He just kept smiling as innocently as he could. So what if he didn’t handle the finances? They split things up evenly all the time, Roadhog could spare 20 bucks out of his stash for the time being and he’d pay him back later. Probably. He would kind of have to if he wanted to stay on his good side. 

“We’ll get some tea, then I’ll go pick up a pizza, bring it back to the hotel.”

“Or two,” Junkrat smirked knowingly.

“Or two.”

“Or three? Maybe?”

“...don’t push it, ‘Rat.”

They strolled around for a bit after getting his tea and came across the central park where there was a lot of open space in the grass. Junkrat perked up and almost dived down in a space in the shade of some trees and waited for Roadhog to do the same. When he didn’t immediately sit down with him, he pulled out a clump of the grass and threw it at him, aiming for his head.

“Sit down, drongo, sheesh. ’s downtime, remember? It was yer idea to begin with, I’d rather be planting bombs around that building than sittin’ here, watching these civvies and Omnics play around with each other. Bunch’a wankers.”

Letting out a sigh, Roadhog plopped down beside him, half in the shade of the trees and half out in the sun. He watched as his boss reclined against the the tree trunk, sipping his tea thoughtfully, the gears in his head slowly starting to turn as he planned a huge speech or something. 

After some time of just sitting and sipping, Junkrat finally shifted over to look at his friend.

“Hey, ‘Hog? You ever think about wantin’ to maybe...I dunno, go back home to Oz?” Junkrat asked as casually as he could. It wasn’t that he was homesick, blimey, that would be the day, but he did kind of...miss being able to be himself more. This hiding around was getting uncomfortable for him. There was a reason that he liked being so open about not only himself but just in general. He might’ve had a loud mouth that got him into dangerous territory, but at least he didn’t have to worry about bathing and wearing clothes that felt too foreign and constricting to his body, suffocating and wanting to make him into something he wasn’t.

Roadhog shook his head. “No real reason to go back.”

“Yeh? You think so?” he finished chomping on the last ball (pearl? Strange name for something that didn’t look or feel like a pearl) and threw the cup into the air, watching it fall back down onto the ground. “Kind of...miss it. Jus’ a li’l bit, ya know? I mean, I love not being in the desert all the time and I like not needin’ to run every time the sky starts to cry, but out here? Everything’s too perfect and I gotta wear actual clothes!”

The deep belly laughter from ‘Hog was loud enough to draw attention to them from the people that were in the park with them and Junkrat couldn’t help but let out a cackle of his own. Both of them had to wipe the tears from their eyes from laughing so hard, but it had been worth it. There was gonna be more to what he had been saying, but the clothing part had gotten to him because wow, his jacket and shirt were still damp, even though the incident with the stranger had been hours ago.

They headed for the hotel afterwards and as soon as Junkrat was situated and back in only his beloved, tattered shorts again, Roadhog went out to get them some real food. Life was good for them at the moment, and it would be getting even better once they drained the bank dry and headed to a new place in a new country. They were living their lives to the fullest and what more could he want more than that? 

Not letting his hat catch on fire again, that was for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pride was fun!!!!!! I spent half the time in a Kink cafe where a friend works lol
> 
> Glad I didn't get TIED UP there for too long aYYYYYYYYYYY pew pew
> 
> no but for real, it was p great u.u


	6. Stockholm Syndrome

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're cold with disappointment  
> While I'm drowning in the next room  
> The last contagious victim of this plague between us  
> I'm sick with apprehension   
> I'm crippled from exhaustion   
> And I dread the moment when you finally come to kill me
> 
> -Stockholm Syndrome by Blink-182

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roadhog is like 85% of Junkrat's self control, as it turns out

The wall would get a dent in it soon if he didn’t stop hitting his head against it. Today hadn’t been a good day for either of them, heist wise. Too many variables to think about for this one. Usually it didn't matter but they needed to wait until the heat on them from their last gig cooled down. Soon as they got back to their hotel, Roadhog had made sure that he got in, then left again without saying another word. He was bored, but also felt like something was off. His bodyguard always told him where he was going. Always. It was part of their agreement; it wasn’t that Junkrat didn’t trust him, no that would never be the case, but he did like knowing that he would be coming back. And he would have to this time, right? Just like all the other times? He kept hitting his head against the wall, a little harder this time to try and push the bad thoughts away. Of course ‘Hog would come back. He always came back.

After a few more seconds of hitting his head, he stopped and looked around him, trying to find something else to do. Nothing much, that was for sure. Everything was still packed and he didn’t want to take stuff out, although it was tempting. Maybe if Roadhog were here to clean up after him...he could throw things out of the window and chuck bombs at them, work on his aim. Or blow the entire room up. Roadhog wouldn’t like that. Probably wouldn’t want to come back to that mess, and he didn’t really feel like explaining why he did such a thing.

The TV was already on, but he had muted it as he liked the way the light from it danced around in various colors. Might be good to turn the volume back on. Distraction, get something to distract yerself, idiot. 

They had one bed between them. Usually did, it was cheaper to do so in their already cheap hotels that they always stayed in unless he was feeling like a king; then they always found the biggest and most expensive hotel and stayed in the penthouse, destroyed it, then left without paying anymore than they had to, usually by figuring out a way to jump through the windows safely. Luxury was nice and all, but he could probably never truly get used to it. He slumped down onto a corner of the bed that was nearest to the TV and flicked the volume back on with the remote and sat there watching it, not really paying attention to what was being said or what was on. Something about sharks? Who knew. He never liked the ocean, although he did go to the beach several times in his youth, and he sort of wanted to go to a beach that wasn’t heavily affected with fallout. But the more he thought about being surrounded by all that open water, the more it didn’t seem all that appealing to him. 

He chewed at his fingernails, ignoring the chemically taste that was permanent by now, and tried to focus on the TV but the more time that passed, the more he began to shift and squirm around, biting at his knuckles and inner wrist, just to be doing something. When that got boring, he got up and paced, limping around until his spring peg leg threatened to give out on him, so he laid down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Still, Roadhog was not back. 

“What’s takin’ him so long, did he go get dinner? For who? There’s plenty of food around here, did he choose the farthest place for take out? Typical. He’s comin’ back though, I know so, he wouldn’t just leave without his shares, he’s not that stupid of a drongo,” Junkrat muttered, trying to soothe himself. “He can’t...but what if he is? Nah, that’ll be the day.”

He sat up abruptly and flipped through the channels, pausing only on the news ones to see if anything came up that concerned them both. He went through them all several times before giving up and threw the remote against the wall, letting out a frustrated yell in the process. He could just go out again, put on his disguise, walk around for a bit, take notes on what needed to be blown up around here (there was plenty. Lots of statues of Omnics around. Disgustin’) or just dig around through people’s garbage, make use of anything that could be recycled into something better. 

No, that wouldn’t be good. Roadhog coming back to an empty hotel room? Yeah, not the best thing. Then he would definitely leave him, or at least go on a rampage trying to find him. He was his boss after all, he still owed him knowledge of the secret and some other stuff. So he got up and paced, hit his head against the same wall some more, watched TV, and waited. And waited. And waited.

Finally, just a little over an hour later, his bodyguard returned with food in tow, along with something huge in his bag that he almost didn’t notice. 

“Brought us back some…Boss, what did you do,” Roadhog stopped in his tracks and took a good look around, trying to figure out how all of this could have happened in a relatively short amount of time. If there was ever a contest where a room needed to be left in shambles, his boss would win in no time.

“Nothin’ mate, what did you get me? Smells good, don’t it? Heh,” Junkrat finished wrapping up his knuckles and put his glove back on, flexing his fingers quickly to make sure that he could still feel them. Yup, they were good. The room? Not so much. He had thrown some stuff around, leaving barely any room to walk around properly, set some things on fire like the wonky little dresser and curtains, and accidentally broke the lamp on the night stand. And the lightbulb on the ceiling. And probably even broke the smoke detector when he tried to shut it off to avoid setting off the sprinkler system. He kicked some of the glass underneath the bed with his boot and got up, hands reaching out for the food containers. “Is it Indian? Smells like curry.”

“Junkrat, what did you do?” His bodyguard raised his voice just a notch and Junkrat backed off, wringing his hands as his anxiety rose up. He didn’t think he would get in that much trouble, it was just a bloody room, for cripes’s sake, it wasn’t like he hadn’t done stuff like this before.

“You took a long time, I got bored, what did you expect? I mean, I could have gone out and left ya here on yer own, but I didn’t ‘cause I knew you’d be mad if I did that, and nothin’s on TV, we’re not that good yet, and I tried not to do anythin’ too irrational-”

“Setting the curtains on fire ain’t rational, boss.”

“I said I tried!” Junkrat’s voice broke and he almost lost it again. “What’s it to ya anyways? What took you so long, huh? Didn’t bother to tell me, you just stormed out of here like you have every right to just go off without me, which you do, don’t get me wrong on that mate, you can do whatever you bloody like, but I’m payin’ ya to be me bodyguard and you just decide, hey, let me just leave and not tell Junkrat what I’m doing, ‘cause he can just bugger, off, yeh? Well I can! I can just pick up me stuff and go, leave ya here in a strange place with yer shares and...and...fuck.”

He felt drained and when he swayed, Roadhog set his stuff down and was by his side in an instant. He let the bigger man help him to the bed where he sat down and started to take off his prosthetics, then decided not to, but he still fiddled with the attachments as he avoided looking at his bodyguard. 

“Jus’...leave me alone, mate. ‘m fine, but you can’t just leave like that, not without tellin’ me first.” 

“…”

“Don’t give me that shit, mate, I just don’t have any real reason to trust ya all the way yet now that we’re here in the outside world.”

“…”

Junkrat snapped his head up and locked eyes with Roadhog. “Why? ‘Cause the last time you went off, you met with some people behind me back and said that they wanted to hire you with better payment. Last I checked, ‘m always gonna have the better deal so there’s no point in even entertainin’ ‘em with your appearance without me.”

“There was traffic,” Roadhog said simply, and got up to lumber over to the loo to wash up.

“So? That’s never stopped ya before mate, you blow through red lights like no one’s business!”

“That’s when we’re runnin’ from the authorities, boss,” he called out before shutting the loo door closed. Junkrat sighed heavily and looked at the TV again, staring at it blankly as his mind raced with unpleasant thoughts. Sure, it had been fun traveling so far, but they had had run ins with people that were interested in hiring just Roadhog, or trying to get both of them to split up with the intent on prying information from either of them about his secret. One time, he had overheard some people propositioning Roadhog at a bar after they bought him a drink, with quite the enticing offer that involved him tricking Junkrat into telling him about what his treasure was and then killing him for a very pretty penny. He had heard his bodyguard decline right away, but still. It didn’t make him feel any better. Well, it did a little bit. It meant that Roadhog showed some loyalty, but loyalty could still be bought for the right price, and maybe he just hadn’t found it yet.

The sound of a toilet flushing and then running water shook him from his thoughts, as well as the unnerving rumbling in his stomach as he realized that he was letting all the food get cold. They didn’t have a microwave or refrigerator, so their meal would go bad if he didn’t do something right quick. Before he could though, his bodyguard came out and got it for him, making sure that he got the warmest container and had as many napkins as he could without giving him all of them. 

“Thanks, mate. Look, I...I didn’t mean to ruin the room, but I didn’t know what else to do.” It was safer this way instead. I missed you and was scared, in other words, without needing to say it out loud.

“‘s fine, boss. Just eat. Got a surprise for you.”

Junkrat immediately tensed at that and paused in taking a bite of tandoori chicken. “You do? Why didn’t you say so before, ya lugnut?” He tried playing it off as him being excited for it, but his anxiety must’ve been tangible at that point because Roadhog put down his mask again after taking some bites of his own meal and all was quiet for a second as he tried to figure out what to do next. Roadhog moved from where he was standing to sit down next to Junkrat on the bed, making sure that they weren’t touching and so that he wasn’t blocking Junkrat from the door, something he knew would just make his charge even more anxious than he already was. Poor kid. Paranoid as fuck these days it seemed.

“Stopped by a place to get you somethin’ that I thought you might like. ‘s fine if you don’t like it. I might keep it for myself then,” He gestured toward his bag, then lifted his mask again and began eating, turning his focus onto the TV. “The ice cream is for me. Don’t touch that, got it?” he added, his words muffled by the food.

Junkrat’s entire being and mood perked up at that. “Ice cream? Why didn’t you say so?”

“‘Cause that’s for me, idiot, I just said so.”

“Then what the hell did ya get me, mate? I’m demandin’ at least a bite!” the excitement was genuine this time and his anxiety almost melted away completely. A part of him still wanted him to believe that this was all just a ruse, but he shoved it aside and headed straight for the bag, eagerly unzipping it and saw not only the ice cream, but also a few pieces of cake that he had been crazy for lately to the point that he had been begging his bodyguard to take him back to the store so that they could take some. Roadhog had said something about it not being healthy for him, but he obviously threw that idea out the window and caved. Finally! 

“Aw, thanks mate, ‘preciate it! I owe ya big time, ya know that? You really didn’t have to!”

“Did too. ‘s the only way to get you shut up.”

“Oi, I can shut up any time I want to, it’s the actual wanting part that needs to happen,” Junkrat grabbed a container of ice cream and brought that back to the bed with him. When he sat down, he made sure that he was leaning against his partner and propped his legs up to his chest. 

“I know I’ve said this before, but you really are me best mate, ‘Hog. Seriously, glad you thought about me while you were out there, I’ve been wantin’ this ever since I laid eyes on it!”

“I know.”

“Wanker,” Junkrat grinned and opened up the ice cream container after setting aside his own food. It was the only warning Roadhog got before it was shoved onto his mouth and a part of his mask, and it took all of his strength to not belt him right then and there as punishment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, did u miss me? I went on vacation to look at a college that I'm transfering to next year and then got writer's block, which is dumb cos the whole point of this is to not get writer's block but guess what still happened
> 
> I got writer's block. Then had a lot of anxiety for various reasons.................
> 
> Fuckin' ace, mate, this ain't what I signed up for
> 
> However, Shark Week (and a summer class) might also have played a huge role in me not writing cos sharks are cool, protect them at all costs, even if they do scare the shit out of me


	7. Liar (It Takes One to Know One)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm an addict for dramatics  
> I confuse the two for love  
> "You can tell me that you don't beg..."
> 
> -Liar (It Takes One to Know One) by Taking Back Sunday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot happens and sometimes I feel bad for Omnics cos wow

On top of the highest building in the city, he kept watch with a pair of binoculars over the operations going on down below while his bodyguard prepped their equipment for the drop landing they were going to attempt in a few minutes if everything kept going according to plan. He had hired some guy off the streets, a dero of sorts, got him cleaned up and dressed all nice to look like a suit, and told him to get caught on purpose in order to lure all the outside guards into one place. What he didn’t tell him was that he would probably be blowing up with them too since the place he was told to bring them to was loaded with explosives, but it just sort of happened to have slipped his mind. How unfortunate. 

“You ready to go there, ‘Hog?” Junkrat asked, watching as all the guards started to chase the poor man through alleyways, trying to flank and cut off their victim, but like a true champ, he kept going, knowing that he was getting paid quite the hefty sum to be doing this. He should hire other people more often, it was way more fun watching someone else get in trouble for them. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out the detonator, his trigger finger itching to push the button, but he stayed calm and collected despite his heart starting to race, pumping adrenaline into his body as the time for their big entrance came nearer. It was the waiting around that killed him most of the time, he was so impatient, but he also knew that it would be worth it to not blow this early on.

His bodyguard grunted in slight pain as he stood up after kneeling for some time to put things in his bag and rusack. He should be a little bit more careful, his knees were starting to bother him a bit. He’d worry about it later, it might just be the freezing air from being up so high and the whipping winds definitely weren’t helping. Junkrat just had to choose this spot to keep watch on, and just had to choose this dangerous gamble of a chance to get down to their targeted building. He just hoped that he didn’t miss the car.

“Good to go, boss,” 

“Perfect. ‘Cause I reckon that in about eight seconds…” He didn’t get to finish his sentence. The man lured the guards to the right spot just a few seconds early and on instinct, he pushed the button and instantly felt satisfaction in watching them all blow up while at the same time blowing a nice large hole in the wall for both of them to get into. Oh, it was such a beautiful scene and he wished that he could do it all over again, but they needed to get going. “Aha! Time to go, time is fast, time is money, mate!”

Junkrat ran to the edge and leapt off of the building, laughing his head off in utter excitement, and fell into the back of the hover car that was waiting for them a couple of stories down. It shifted under his weight, but it dipped down dangerously fast, threatening to tilt forward soon as Roadhog landed. Luckily for them, the car righted itself and Roadhog took control of the wheel, swiftly guiding their get away vehicle towards the gaping hole in their new target. It was yet another bank, only this time the vault had a lot more than just money in it. Valuable items such as family heirlooms passed down from generation to generation were in there as well as pricey jewels and other things that they knew people would pay in blood to get back. Not that they were interested in ransoming, they were just interested in taking and getting away with it.

They moved fast, speeding towards the building in their hover car and then as soon as they were close enough, jumped out. By then, they could hear sirens in the distant, and just as they entered the building after walking through scattered body parts and debris, they saw police Omnics pointing their guns at them, ready to shoot. 

“Put your hands up where we can see them! Hands up! You’re under arrest!” the lead Omnic yelled. By the looks of it, he was probably a commander. Bloody awful that. What was the world coming to?

“So, Roadhog, honest opinion here, mate. Were we set up? ‘Cause I don’t remember these pieces of junk being a part of this job, do you? This was supposed to be a piece a piss,” Junkrat asked sincerely, carefully setting down his frag launcher onto the ground, then raised his hands up slowly. They always had a back up plan, but that was usually when they had already gotten their loot and were on their way back to their hideout. His bodyguard grunted and reached for his hook, ready to defend his boss. “Probably was that guy that I hired’s fault. Next time, we make sure that whoever I hire next ain’t a dobber. When did he have time to go to the coppers though? Oh well.”

“Hey, hey! I said hands up! Don’t make any sudden movements, pig face!”

“Oi! I’m the only one allowed to call the heifer that, ya yobbos!” Junkrat kicked his frag launcher up into the air and caught it. In no time, his smiley face painted bombs were bouncing around everywhere, giving the Omics a good scare right before they blew to pieces. One of them was still on and functioning (or “alive” as Omnic loving civvies would say) and it looked like it was trying to move. As his bodyguard moved on to check if there were any more surprises around the corner, he stalked on over to it and squatted down, getting close to it’s face. It was the commander. Just the thing he was hoping for. 

“G’day, mate, seems like you come a gutser. Cryin’ shame that. Usually I would blow yer kind up right quick without thinkin’ much of it, but ‘m feelin’ a little generous today and want to give you a fair go, yeh? His name’s Roadhog, ya bodgy arsehole, don’t you be callin’ him names, that’s my job. I’m Junkrat, and I’m sure you’ve heard of us and our reputation by now, and I know you know what we think of utter filth like you. Before it’s lights out for ya, ‘m gonna leave a message for the others that’ll be comin’ along and you’re gonna help. Come on now.”

Junkrat hauled the dying commander to a place and left him there as to join Roadhog in finishing up taking what they could. When they came back, the Omnic was still moving around and tried talking, but Junkrat just kicked its head and finished loading the hover car. Just as the sirens started to sound like they were right on top of them, he went back for the commander and threw it into the car too, then after jumping in himself, went to work on it while Roadhog sped off to the place where they had left his chopper.

“Why’d you bring that _thing_ in here, boss?” Roadhog didn’t bother to hide his disgust.

“I’m gonna give these bunch’a no-hopers and idiotic peace and Omnic lovin’ pollys a proper farewell and good riddance. Keep driving, can’t you see that ‘m busy workin’?”

His bodyguard grunted and left it at that. They had about more than a dozen cop cars following them now, still in the distance, but still too close for their comfort. Roadhog had to do some impressive tricks to shake most of them off, but there were still a few determined to catch up to them. That was when Junkrat decided that he was finished enough with the commander Omnic and pushed it out of the car. That got the rest of the cops to slam on their breaks and investigate, worried that the two dangerous and now international criminals had killed a hostage. 

The smile on his face was probably the biggest he ever smiled as the Omnic did what it had been told, which was to give them officers a certain message, then warn them of the bomb that he had implanted in its chest. All of them tried to scatter, and a few got away, but a beautiful (and probably final for the night) explosion filled the street and he could have sworn that he felt some of the heat, despite the distance. 

“Now that’s a scene I’d play over and over again if I could. Come on ‘Hog, I kinda wanna do a maccas run after this, ’m starvin’.”

“…”

“Please? Roadie me best mate, me ol’ pal, ol’ friend, I know that you’re low on gas in yer chopper, and I mean, she’s a beaut an’ all, but she’s a guzzler and so am I,” Junkrat made his way into the passenger seat and propped his legs up onto the dashboard and reclined as far back as he could to stretch out more.

“…”

“Eh, in both senses I guess, though think we might know that by now, huh?,” the younger man snorted his bodyguard just rolled his eyes and shook his head with a slight smirk on his face, glad to know that it was hidden by his mask. After a few more minutes of begging to get some more food, they came to an empty lot where they were dumping the hover car and walked the rest of the way to the abandoned shack to the chopper. 

They did do the maccas run when they got back to the town where they were staying at, three hours away, right after Roadhog managed to find a place to refill his tank. They had to stay low of course, so finding some individuals that still had gas that he needed at their disposal was a little hard to come by now a days, but when they did find it, Junkrat would fork over some of their profits, which was mostly why they tended to fill the tank after heists instead of before. 

The two of them finally found a new little hotel to stay at after checking out of the old one, just to keep them moving around, almost like old times. They were used to being nomads of sorts and it kept Junkrat from becoming too bored of a place, because when that happened, there were usually threats of burning the place to the ground, and there may have been a couple of times when he went through with it. Or maybe more than a couple of times. Roadhog didn’t really care, it was just imperative that they move around to keep the brat from squirming too much.

After they had walked into their room, Roadhog took care of everything as per usual while Junkrat flipped the telly on and browsed through the channels as he wolfed down his fourth burger. It was hard to tell if the kid truly was starving all the time or just had an excellent metabolism. Or both. When he was finished, he joined him on the bed, taking his side on the left as usual and laid down with his upper back propped up by a couple of pillows. He didn’t bother to ask what was on. Lots of things could catch his boss’s attention, but rarely were they able to keep it for long. Then, after realizing that Junkrat had tossed the remote aside and was totally engrossed in the program that was on, he spoke. 

“What’s this? Sharks?”

No answer. Not even a slight twitch of muscle, which was off putting. Rare was the moment that Junkrat was this still, even in his sleep.

“Hey, boss? ‘Rat, you hear me?”

“What?” Junkrat looked back quickly only to return his attention to the screen of clear blue ocean, like what Roadhog had once known and loved. “Oh yeh, it’s Shark Week or somethin’, I saw it the other day and this one’s new, so I wanted to watch it. What the heck are those things called? D’ya know mate? Kind of like ‘em, their teeth are something else, aren’t they? An’ get a load of those eyes! They’re kinda like yers, er, rather the mask that is, at least. Big black saucers.”

“They’re called mako sharks. You’d know that if you listened more,” the older man chided lightly, smiling at hearing him say his own name again after years of refusing to. It felt odd, but he knew that Junkrat wouldn’t catch on. 

“A mako?”

Roadhog nodded and couldn’t help feeling annoyed, but pleased to hear Junkrat say his name. It was strange, but maybe one day they might be on a real first name basis. Maybe.

“Mako. Noice,” Junkrat yawned and leaned against Roadhog, content for the moment. He had removed his omnic parts for his own personal reasons that might have had to do with the Omnic run in earlier, and he rested his arm stump on top of his friend’s stomach. When he finally couldn’t stay awake any longer, he slumped back, muttered a goodnight or something along those lines, and promptly started snoring lightly after rolling onto his side, and it wasn’t long before Roadhog joined him after cleaning himself up a bit, exhausted from the day’s activities. He laid back down onto the bed, turned off the light, then settled down, wrapping a protective arm around the smaller man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: When I saw Taking Back Sunday, Adam Lazzara climbed on up onto the rafters of the temporary stage (it was a festival) and hung upside down there by hooking his knees onto a horizontal pole or whatever while singing this song (or another one but i think it was this one)
> 
> I guess my message is to not do that, he almost fell.
> 
> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 2009 was a hella good year for me concert wise, let's just say that.
> 
> ........also just realized how much food i make these guys eat and it's almost always junk wow, it's almost as if they were juNKERS whOOPS a daisy
> 
> also also, is anyone interested in some nsfw content? i mean i know i probably shouldn't even be asking, but i landed on a song (which also happens to be TBS) that i have the perfect situation for and i'm wondering if u want a separate fic for it or if i should just add it here. let me know ok i kind of rly like comments


	8. Overture 1812 - The Final

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ~Instrumental~
> 
> -Overture 1812 - The Final by Tchaikovsky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Americans in Overwatch try to get the team together to celebrate their country's independence, but this is also to use it as an excuse to let Junkrat use up his experimental explosives and fireworks. (aka basically wanted another team interaction :v and obviously this was also a song chosen instead of coming up on shuffle. Oh, and also inspired by a text post from ROTBODY on tumblr about Junkrat having his own stream to show off his obsession to others. Nerd.)

“Have you ever watched V for Vendetta? You seem like the kind of person that would have seen it at some point, Jamie.” 

“What? Nah, I’ve only watched where they blow up Parliament. I’ve been there before and thought of recreating it, though! Unfortunately I’m banned from the UK now after, you know, stealing the crown jewels an’ all. Kind of funny, ain’t it?” Junkrat giggled and spun around in his chair in the break room where a couple other team mates were gathering up supplies for the night’s events. The Americans in the group had wanted to throw a small party in celebration of their freedom that they won a couple of hundred years ago, but the rest of the team had pretty much only gone along with it just to not upset their feelings. It was one day a year anyways, they could manage the nationalism, whether it was ironic or genuine, for that long. 

D. Va had been asked to talk to Junkrat and eventually get him to agree to use up some of his more experimental products, aka, products that the older team members were wary of and while yes, they didn’t expect for Junkrat, the explosive obsessed kind of ex-criminal, to change any time soon, they did want to keep the base relatively safe. She didn’t mind taking on the job as she and Junkrat got along thanks to their mutual love for mechs (he and Roadhog were helping her build a new one from scratch, so it was less refined but she liked it that way; and they weren’t awful people all of the time either, just...very different views about what it was to be freedom fighters), she was just unsure how to ask politely, like Soldier 76 had wanted her to, using his fatherly voice that made her roll her eyes every time. She decided it would be better to be upfront about it. Junkrat wasn’t one to take hints most of the time.

“What’s funny is that your last name is Fawkes, and you like to sing that part of the song that plays at the end sometimes when you set up a bomb trap,” she snickered, finishing up her doritos and threw the empty bag at Junkrat as he spun around, who batted it away, still giggling.

“Yeh, so what of it, mate? Yer last name is Song, is that why you’re askin’ me?”

“Duh! You should show off your new bombs! Or maybe even create some fireworks! It would be pretty cool if you did and OH! I could stream it! Some of my viewers are American, they would love it! Besides, it might give you a chance to see what you can ‘accidentally’ blow up around here,” the young girl leaned back in her chair and propped her feet up onto the table and smiled, knowing that her offer was too good to resist from the look on Junkrat’s face. “Think it might be worth seeing all the different reactions, especially 76! He’s gonna flip.”

“No feet on the table, Hana,” Reaper muttered, sipping at his bitter coffee as he leaned against the counter where the coffee machine was. He had walked in, dressed in his more casual clothes, leaving behind the owl inspired mask and trench coat that he wore normally. The other people in the room had left, having gotten what they needed. “You should know that by now.”

“Glad that’s the only thing you care about, Edgelord.”

“What? What else should I be caring about?” he paused and looked at them hard, tilting his head to the side. They both knew that look. It was time to move on and figure out what to do next then. Long as D. Va was able to convince her sort of friend to use up his experiments, she was good to go, and also realized that yes, it was a win win as she could get some views in while letting her audience get a peek at her life now. When she stood up, Junkrat hesitantly did too, not too sure of what she was doing, and he definitely didn’t like being around Reaper much as he asked too many uncomfortable questions when they were alone together. 

“Uh, we’re gonna go work on the mech, we’ll be back later!” 

“Hana? Jamison! What are you two planning?” Reaper slammed his coffee cup down and was about to follow them, but Winston and Soldier 76 wandered in and he decided that it was best not to get lectured on “scaring the kids” yet again.

“Bye bye!” D. Va waved and grabbed Junkrat’s hand briefly to tell him to follow her, and they made their way down to the garage like area where all their weapons and special equipment were kept. The tall Aussie ran on up ahead soon as he laid eyes on their Junker inspired mech in progress and D. Va beamed proudly at him when he looked back at her. This was their shared creation, and while it wasn’t as cute as her original mech, it would still be able to function the same, it would just be a bit more interpersonal. 

“Say, Hana, this stream that you’re thinkin’ of. How many people do ya reckon will be watching me?” Was he nervous? No, that couldn’t be it. Anxious probably, but not nervous. He fiddled with a monkey wrench that he had picked up, intent on actually working on the mech. 

“Eh, depends. I would expect the online traffic to come more from North America, along with my more loyal viewers who watch basically anything that I do,” she pulled out her phone and tweeted that she would be streaming a guest later on that night, deciding that she should probably warn her viewers ahead of time. Most responded back hoping for it to be Lúcio, but she ignored the incoming messages and returned her attention to Junkrat and her mech. “Don’t worry about it too much, although I’m sure some would go insane if you put on quite the show.”

“You think? Hm, d’ya think I should start me own stream?” In a few minutes they could work on melding the rockets to it, if she wanted to. She didn’t seem too interested in working on her mech, but he kept working anyways.

D. Va pursed her lips, thinking all of about five seconds about it. “Maybe after we see the response to you showing off your new bombs and explosives. People don’t want to watch something that they can see elsewhere, you have to be more creative about it.”

“Just how many videos are there that show off things exploding?” he was skeptical that there were others like him, and he was skeptical about others wanting to watch his obsession. In his experience, not many people were fond of explosions like he was, but that might be because they were mostly involved or threatened by said explosions. Speaking of explosions, they would need to go over chemical combinations again in case she wanted the self destruction sequence to be bigger and better.

“Plenty. Just use your new stuff and you’ll be getting views in no time! You can always remake them later on, can’t you? Wouldn’t want to prove any noobs that think otherwise right,” D. Va got the two protective masks for them and gave one to Junkrat, then got the welding machine and booted it up. After putting on some gloves, she took one handle and began to meld some rough patches together. Meanwhile, he seemed like he was too stunned to continue on working.

“Of course I can! Who says that I can’t?” 

“Well…I’m not gonna name names. ‘Sides, you don’t even know them.”

“Wha-who do they think I am, some kinda drongo?” the young demolitions expert was overcome with a sense of being insulted and he became defensive. “I can remake anythin’ that I want to, long as I got the materials. You said that I should blow up some stuff around here, yeh? With me new products?”

“Yup. Definitely gonna be streaming it too, so just let me know when you’re ready to do-”

“I’m gonna go get set up right away! Where do ya think would be best, mate? Oh, never mind, I think I know just the place, I’ll catch ya later, Hana!” Junkrat threw down his tools and chucked the mask away as he sprinted back to the main area of the base in his lopsided way. “Roadhog? Roadhog! Aw, for cryin’ out loud, heifer, you’re supposed to be within shoutin’ distance at all times!”

D. Va giggled and continued on welding together her mech. She had done what Soldier 76 has asked of her and now she just needed set up cameras in preparation for the night’s activities that were sure to be a blast. Literally. After working for another hour or so, Junkrat returned briefly to tell her where he was going to be and for her to make sure that any of her equipment that she was planning on using should be set up behind him on the roof at a fair distance, just in case anything went haywire. These were, after all, experiments. She confirmed and then realized that this maybe wasn’t such a good idea if even Junkrat wasn’t sure how his new products would perform, but Soldier 76 had been adamant about it so she was stuck in dealing with the consequences. Sighing, she went off to her room to figure out how exactly she was going to set up everything on the roof.

Later that night, when the sun began to set, everyone on the base met up in the dining hall and Junkrat made his little announcement. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone, but they all agreed to go see his show. It was a good idea to be with him instead of in a place that he might be aiming for. 

When the time came and everyone had piled onto the roof in their blankets and warm clothes (how was he still shirtless?), he set off the fireworks that he knew would be a good start and made quite the fool of himself in front of the cameras as he was just too excited to be doing something that normally no one wanted him to do. Chatting away as usual, he explained the process of cooking up some nice new products that he was planning on using briefly right before he set them off by tossing them up and away from the roof. The first batch of experimental explosives did pretty well, and he only dropped one of them onto the ground below, leaving a fairly large crater in the spot that it landed on. 

“Haha, whoops. Er, sorry ‘bout that! And that’s why you gotta throw them up in the air if you’re usin’ em for show like I am. Nasty li’l buggers these are.”

The next few batches did just as well, and he took note of what could have gone better or what to change; there were a few duds, but that was to be expected as those might have been the ones that he miscalculated the mixtures of. It felt pretty good to be in his element without people stopping him. By this time, the finale was coming up and as he set it up, he gave D. Va and Lúcio the signal for them to start the song that D. Va had mentioned earlier and then have everyone back up about twenty more feet. Or thirty. As the song built up, he unveiled the massive single firework at the end of a huge line of smaller fireworks, all set up so that when he lit the start of the flammable string, they would go off in a rapid succession, then end with the biggest bang ever. Hopefully. There was still time for something to go horribly wrong. Roadhog had his chain out just in case he needed to be bailed out. 

What he loved the most about the fireworks was definitely the boom that he felt in his chest every time they exploded in the air after shooting up so high into the sky. The lights were his second favorite thing and he liked them the best when they shimmered. It was just a very satisfying thing for him, but it was also kind of sad. They only lasted so long before disappearing entirely with only a thin sheet of smoke leaving any kind of sign of what happened, and then the smoke was carried away by the winds. It was a temporary joy that no one else but him found to be utterly beautiful. Of course, others would say that the displays were beautiful, but...not like the kind of beauty he saw. It was wonderful but they were gone so quick, too quick…

He set fire to the start of the string when he heard the song start to reach it’s well known peak and booked it out of there, looking over his shoulder and counted down until both the fireworks and song matched up, lighting up the night sky with an incredible array of colors and sounds that was sure to make this a memorable experience for everyone. He took his place next to Roadhog and a beefy hand laid itself softly on his right shoulder. As much as he didn’t want to, he looked away from the fireworks momentarily to smile up at Roadhog, then as he looked back, he leaned more against him. They stood like that for a few minutes before the fireworks started to wane and it was time for the big finale.

“You know what ‘Hog? I think I kinda like this 4th of July shit. Why has no one told me that it could be this much fun?”

His best mate shrugged and watched as the massive final firework flew up into the sky, leaving behind a trail of bright off white light before exploding into several fireworks that then branched out into smaller and even smaller ones. It was indeed a spectacular display and the older team members had to agree, it might be good for Junkrat to have this kind of fun more often.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically whenever Junkrat makes those li'l V for Vendetta comments ingame I die, it's so cute like wow what a nerd. 
> 
> Happy fourth, I hope that you had a nice and safe one! I went to go see fireworks, then Finding Dory and that's basically it cos i rly don't like 4th of july lol
> 
> However, I do have to say happy birthday Captain America u.u
> 
> (next chapter should be nsfw stuff, the people have chosen. thank u for the comments!)


	9. MakeDamnSure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long night spent with your most obvious weakness  
> You start shaking at the thought   
> you are everything I want  
> 'Cause you are everything I'm not
> 
> And we lay, we lay together just not  
> Too close, too close (How close is close enough?)
> 
> -MakeDamnSure by Taking Back Sunday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Junkrat needs, Roadhog wants. A mutual agreement is developed that had probably been there the whole time. Here have some smut from a usually non-smut writer.

Waking up in the middle of the night was a habit for him as it was more of a safety issue more than anything else, even though he had his bodyguard now there keeping watch for him. However, he would sometimes wake up and see that Roadhog had fallen asleep, especially if their day had been extremely demanding for him, and that day had been. They had to find yet another place to sleep as more Bounty hunters had located their position and it had been just an entire day of being chased through the desert, which normally would have been fun, but it was getting tiring now. Roadhog looked like he was out for the count, but he had been with the older man for long enough now to know that he was still a light sleeper, and would awaken at almost any small sound, ready to defend them both. Junkrat rubbed his eyes with his organic hand and that was when it hit him that he had the start of a hard on, and it was like a switch in his brain had been activated. He needed to get that taken care of right away by any means necessary as he could tell that he wouldn’t be going back to sleep anytime soon if he didn’t.

Usually when this urge came up, he would go try to find some place private and take care of it there, but they were in a cave that was devoid of any privacy, so that meant that he would have to go outside, but he didn’t want to leave the warmth that was Roadhog and the pile of blankets beneath them and venture out into the night where it was sure to be cold as balls. He bit his tongue to try and keep his laugh down. Then he thought about getting up anyways to maybe take a walk and stretch his limbs a bit but he just...didn’t really want to go to that much effort. The need to reach an orgasm was a little overwhelming and okay, it was weird being this close to his bodyguard while he wanked himself off, but he just really, really, _really_ , needed that release and besides, maybe he wanted to get caught. It added to his need and he began imagining what that might be like, being found this vulnerable by his best mate. Frowning, he pushed that last part to the back of his mind. There was no way Roadhog would appreciate that in any way, shape, or form.

He tried to keep as quiet as he could by biting and chewing on his lower lip as he slipped his hand down the front of his daks, wrapping his hand at the base of his dick. It would be more comfortable if he took off his shorts for this, and he might if it became too much, but for now he felt like this was a more safer option. Well, as safe as it could be given the circumstances. He started to pump, slowly at first to give him time to rethink this decision, but he quickened the pace as he decided that he should just get this over with. It was a little awkward trying to figure out how to go about this as Roadhog was on his right side, shielding him from the entrance to the cave, which meant that to be courteous, he would need to shift onto his left side to face away from Roadhog, yet doing so would mean that it would be uncomfortable for him as he would be laying down on his organic arm, which would eventually cut circulation, ruining everything, but he didn’t want to be laying in his back either. Why was this so hard to figure out. He kept shifting around, trying to figure out a more comfortable position when suddenly he felt Roadhog’s body shift as well. 

“What are you doing?”

“Bugger,” Junkrat whispered, freezing in place. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK. He was getting close too, he couldn’t just stop now, it wasn’t fair, he should know what it was like being on the edge...did he? Junkrat shifted onto his back and squinted up at Roadhog as he became distracted by that thought. Did he ever wank off either? He’d never seen him crack a fat before, but surely he must’ve, morning wood and all or whatever. How big was his donger anyways in comparison to the rest of his body? It was probably quite impressive and might even feel nice if-

“‘Boss?” 

“Huh?” He snapped out of it, gobsmacked, and his eyes widened as he realized that this was really happening, and it wasn’t some sort of weird dream that he could easily wake up from and pretend that it never happened. Roadhog was looking down at him and he knew that the look on his face (if he could see it) would be bad. But that low voice of his was doing something to him again and he tried to hide the way he had twitched, yet it was kind of hard to in the light of the full moon that was pouring into the small opening above them. Junkrat tried his best not to imagine him saying his name, that would probably send him over and that would probably be the worst way he had come in a long time. Or the best. He wouldn’t know until it happened.

“What are you doing?” Roadhog asked again, this time his voice more raspy and lower, quieter, and the much larger man sat up and moved so that he was looming over him and it just made things so much worse, why did he find that to be really attractive, especially at a time like this? He fought the urge to continue stroking himself. 

“Nothing?” he tried, smiling sheepishly and wanted to just roll over and try to ignore what just happened but he couldn’t fucking take his hand off his dick. This was turning into some kind of nightmare. Just as he started to shift again, he was roughly pushed onto his back again, his arms forced to the sides and that was almost good enough to make him come as he liked the roughness, yet irritatingly enough, he didn’t and it was just painful at this point, not exactly that comfortable anymore, he needed that high and release or else he might actually die at this point. He tried to talk as squirmed against the calloused hand that was on his chest and holding him down, and he accidentally bucked up, grazing his now neglected cock that had slipped out from his daks against Roadhog’s stomach, and fuck, did that feel good too. 

He barely noticed that his bodyguard was now hovering over him, taking interest in what was unfolding before him. Junkrat was flushed and sweating, panting with desire and the need to come, and probably babbling on about being sorry or making some sort of excuse, but he decided to use this opportunity to test something instead of stopping everything all together, which would have been the more appropriate thing to do in this situation. It would change their relationship, but it wouldn’t be the first time that they had gotten into an almost similar situation that they never talked about.

“Oi, let me go, drongo!” Junkrat almost begged with a hint of a nervous chuckle as he bucked up again, this time intentionally. Roadhog’s belly was soft and it just felt nice for him to be grinding against something that wasn’t his hand, and while the surface of Roadhog’s skin wasn’t smooth, the texture of it somehow added to the experience. It was at this point that both of them knew that something was going to happen, but what it was was kind of up to Roadhog now as he had the upper hand. Damn pig.

“This ain’t nothin’, Junkrat,” Roadhog leaned in, getting close to his boss’s face and took pleasure in watching him squirm even more and almost frantically buck up a couple of times when he said his name. “Wanna tell me again what you’re doing?”

Junkrat’s breathing hitched as he tried to form coherent sentences. “I-I was just tryin’ to get it over with, I swear, I didn’t wanna go outside for it-”

“For what?” Roadhog’s voice was just getting huskier each time he opened his mouth and it was just making Junkrat more irritated and angrier than anything else now. How dare he interrupt him and then drag this out? What did he want? Why did it matter that much to him? Bloody bastard, he should cut some of his pay for this.

“Oh for-Mate, are you gonna interrogate me or finish me off? I’m really close to goin’ over-ah, okay, okay,” He gasped as his bodyguard’s put his other hand on his left hip, squeezing with a little pressure as he wrapped his fingers around his body. He shut his eyes and clenched his jaw in an effort to not whimper as Roadhog’s hand wandered down farther, fingers slipping back in front, caressing his stomach lightly as they made their way to his cock that was throbbing now with need more than ever. He tried to get ahold of himself as he didn’t want to blow his load before anything else happened, and he was really curious to see what ‘Hog was planning on doing with him, but it was just a little too hard (very hard) at the moment to put two and two together, because Roadhog was teasing him and wasn’t mad or anything, he seemed to be enjoying this and just.

“Ah, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay-”

Roadhog paused, fingers hovering in place. “You feeling okay, ‘Rat?”

“Oh yeh, more than okay, just…blimey. Uh,” Junkrat laid his head back in frustration, trying to comprehend his situation. His odd wish had been granted, he had been caught, and now it seemed like Roadhog was about to give him a hand job maybe and wow, that was great, this was great, bloody fantastic really, but was it fair to take advantage him like that? The twitching down there wasn’t helping in his thinking process. “Could you...Give me a sec, mate.”

“Want me to continue?” Roadhog removed his hands from the other man’s body, unsure if he should actually keep going. Junkrat was breathing funny, but it was probably just from being worked up too much too fast from outside stimulation, but what if the other man was having second thoughts about this? Sure, Junkrat was flirtatious with him most of the time after they had gotten comfortable with each other, but never did anything else besides that, so he had assumed that that was just a part of his personality.

“Wha-I never said to stop, you lug!” Junkrat bolted upright, only to be pushed down again, just like he had hoped would happen. When his head hit the ground he let out a laugh of excitement and Roadhog couldn’t help but chuckle a little at that. If this was really going to happen, there might as well be some fun in it.

“No, no you didn’t, ‘Rat.”

That earned him a moan and he watched as the younger man unraveled before him as Roadhog slipped off his daks. Junkrat’s hands were trying to cover up his face either from embarrassment or shyness, which was adorable when he thought about it, because Junkrat usually was never shy or embarrassed about anything. He pulled the younger man closer to him by the legs, and automatically Junkrat spread them as far as he could go, his spring peg leg jamming into the dirt. Even more interesting. By this time he was just as aroused and thought about taking him right then and there, something he had been thinking about for some time, but his boss seemed too close for it to be any good for both of them. He would have to wait it out then.

“You ever done something like this before?” Roadhog asked, palming Junkrat’s base and marveled over the response his body gave him as he wrapped a couple of fingers, not his whole hand, around his cock. No, Junkrat wasn’t the cleanest person around, but neither was he, so he couldn’t bash the other for his uncleanliness and lack of hygiene in his nether regions. He was just glad that he wasn’t being asked to give him a blowie. He would probably never get the taste out of his mouth for a long time, and thinking about it anymore would kill his enthusiasm. 

“Uh, not really? Er, there were a few times before, I think? Before I met you? I dunno, but I just need you to keep goin’ or somethin’ you’re killin’ me here, ‘Hog!”

Roadhog raised an eyebrow at that. Maybe he would find out later about what Junkrat meant about that. Until then, he just started up a slow rhythm, wanting to edge the other. His boss had basically given him control and he was going to take full advantage of that. He spoke again, calling him pet names just to see if his voice really did get the brat off, and when he laughed at that, finding it to be amusing, Junkrat squirmed even more until his back arched up, making a noise that sounded beautiful in a strange way to Roadhog. He could tell that the younger man was just about there, so he picked up the pace, and right around the fourth stroke, Junkrat’s face contorted as he came with a whimper, shamelessly riding out his orgasm as cum spilled onto Roadhog’s fingers and both of their stomachs. 

Panting, Junkrat relaxed finally and closed his eyes, still skeptical of whether or not this was an elaborate wet dream of some sorts, but when he opened his eyes again, Roadhog was before him, kneeling back, wiping his hand on the dirt before getting up to find the water canteen to wash it and his stomach off properly. The back of his legs twitched along with his waning dick and he just didn’t have the strength to do anything else but lie there awkwardly, practically naked. Eventually, he grabbed his daks and asked for the water reserves in order to clean the gunk off of himself too. 

Afterwards, when Junkrat had wiped away what he could and put on his shorts again, he padded back over to the pile of blankets and sat down, keeping his back to Roadhog in slight shame and embarrassment. 

“You didn’t have to do that,” he said quietly. “‘m not payin’ you to jack me off or whatever.”   
“I know that, ‘Rat.”

He looked over his shoulder, his distrust coming back now that things were over. “Then...why’d you do it, mate?”

“Wanted to.”

There had to be a better explanation than that, his paranoia was screaming at him now for letting himself become that vulnerable to Roadhog, to let him have full control over him and it was just...there had to be another motive behind this, there usually was. He laid back down on the blankets and took comfort in being in contact with his best mate’s skin again. It wasn’t exactly cuddling, but it wasn’t like neither of them wanted the other to be far apart from each other.

“’m gonna fire you for misconduct with yer employer, ya absolute bastard.”

The larger and older man shrugged. “I do what I’m told. Boss.”

Junkrat grinned that wide grin of his and nuzzled his face against a beefy yet muscular arm, content with how the night turned out. Maybe ‘Hog really didn’t have a reason, and that was just fine with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of feelings over this song and a lot of memories associated with it sigh and also sorry for this i just do not write a whole lot of smut lol and also sorry for switching between daks and shorts
> 
> Also, can we just take a moment to think about how big Roadhog is in comparison to Junkrat? Do u think Junkrat likes that? Cos I mean, he's finally found someone that's taller and larger than him, I'm like 99% sure he's in love with Roadhog just for that reason alone. Cos he's like fuCKING 6'5 WHO LET THIS MAN BE THIS TALL
> 
> SHIT SON
> 
> im never getting over that.
> 
> (also shoutout to rotbody, the person who created the junkrat streaming text post :v)


	10. Can’t Stop Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soul boy, down and alone  
> And his soul is broken again  
> But you can't stop moving  
> No you won't stop moving along
> 
> -Can’t Stop Feeling by Franz Ferdinand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY READ THIS FIRST PLEASE:
> 
> So, I've been thinking about stuff after I posted my last chapter, and I kind of want to separate nsfw from this. So like, I'll be deleting the last chapter that I posted and start a new fic, which I think I'll keep in this format, if that makes sense. NSFW oneshots between these two junk dudes, especially since Roadhog didn't rly get any love yet. Just wanted to give you a heads up!

It was day one without Roadhog. 

He was laying on the bed, curled up in a fetal position, after having woken up with the realization that he was truly on his own, and the lack of warmth and smell of the other man next to him was almost enough to make him scream. Instead, Junkrat bit down on his knuckles and let out a muffled, frustrated whimper. He wouldn’t cry, that was too over the top, even for him, but the feeling of being this bloody vulnerable without his bodyguard was becoming more and more overwhelming as he became more aware of his situation. If anyone, especially mercenaries, found out his location, well. He needed to work faster then. It was better to be two steps ahead than two steps behind. 

Junkrat worked on his plan that he had started the night before, using the hotel paper pad and pen provided. He was going to try and break his partner out, but he didn’t really know how he was going to do that. He had a vague idea of what the jail looked like, but that didn’t mean that Roadhog was going to end up there. Hell, he didn’t even know if the other man was still alive. Shootouts usually didn’t end until the suspect was dead. At least that was the way it was around here. When he couldn’t take it anymore, he paced back and forth, grabbed a dud bomb of his, and cracked it open after he resettled in the chair, tearing out the wires to reuse them later on.

The telly blared out, just background noise to him, until something along the lines of what happened regarding last night’s activities stood out to him. He snapped his head and attention to the screen and immediately stopped what he was doing when he saw the familiar faces. As he fumbled for the remote to turn up the volume, he listened intently to the brunette woman in a blue dress speak about the man in the mugshot picture along side a quick photo take of himself during the time they robbed a bank earlier in the month. 

“If you’re just tuning in with us this morning, authorities arrested notorious international Australian criminal Mako Rutledge, who is also widely known by his alias, Roadhog, during a raid last night thanks to a couple of anonymous tips sent to the police. His partner in crime and employer, Jamison Fawkes, better known by alias Junkrat, has yet to be found, despite evidence of him being at the scene of the incident as well as various witness accounts that place him there. Civilians are encouraged to keep an eye out and call the number below to give the police any information, even if you think it isn’t important. Here’s Eldritch County Police Chief Roger Morgan with a statement.”

The image of Roadhog’s mask alongside the image of his own face switched abruptly to a burly fellow with a full mustache and stern look, gazing into the camera with purpose and determination that Junkrat swore he could reach out and touch with his organic hand, it was that tangible. He just glared back, waiting to hear what the jacks had to say about them now. Nothing good, that was for sure the case. Unconsciously, his hands tinkered with the wires, twisting and untwisting them, and his organic leg bounced up and down. He needed to keep moving.

“Dear citizens of Eldritch County and beyond. We are currently looking for the Australian criminal Jamison Fawkes, aka, Junkrat. He is considered armed and dangerous, incredibly knowledgable of explosives and other weaponry. If you see him, call the authorities immediately and evacuate the area. Do not approach him. Please call us at the number given on screen to tell us any information of his whereabouts, or to tell us anything else about him; even if you think that the information you have is useless, please give us a call anyways. Every single piece helps bring together a puzzle for us that will help get him off the streets as soon as possible. Remember, he is a dangerous man, do not approach him even if you think you’re capable of being a vigilante. Just because we have his bodyguard in custody does not mean that he is totally without defense; he is a terrorist and should be treated as such. Thank you, we hope to hear from you soon.”

“That was Eldritch County Police Chief Roger Morgan with his statement for last night’s raid. Next up, traffic and the weather-”

The screen shattered as the remote hit the TV. His heart sank as he had listened to the statement, but what he was feeling quickly turned to solid rage. It was time to take a walk to the store and buy what he needed, or at least the best things that were available in the small suburban town that he moved to briefly after packing up their stuff and gunning it out of the city. But first, he needed to shower. Or take a bath. Either or, as much as he really didn’t want to (never wanted to), he knew that if he were to go out to get the supplies needed, he would have to keep any attention on him as low as possible, which would be hard given that he was incredibly tall compared to everyone else, but hopefully if he was cleaned up enough, he would just be another face in the crowd. A very short crowd, but a crowd nonetheless. Besides, he was used to stooping, so if need be, he could just change his height, so to speak. With or without Roadhog, he needed to keep going forward. Who knew? There might be more times like this in the future. 

As the water ran, Junkrat just stared at it, his mind racing, yet also felt blank at the same time. Soon as it was deep enough (which wasn’t very deep at all) he removed his leg but left his arm on so that he could have some sort of stability getting in and out of the bath. The cruddy hair dryer could dry up what a towel couldn’t. Plus, two hands could get the job done faster than just one, and time was not on his side for this one. Roadhog might be moved to a tighter security facility if he hadn’t been already. He would need to make a few calls to ensure where his bodyguard was throughout the day. 

Once he had drained the tub and refilled it a couple of times, the water finally ran clear, mostly. He would probably never truly be clean or not have oil and gun powder caked onto his skin, and that was fine with him because it was a part of who he was. Just as long as he smelled relatively like a person who kept up their hygiene for the next few hours, he should be fine. He struggled just a little getting out of the slippery tub, and might have accidentally fallen onto the floor face first, but it was just a step forward towards getting his best mate back by his side. That alone gave him the strength to pour some mouthwash into a cup and swish it around for more than his usual five seconds. It just tasted awful, but this was for Roadhog. When he spat, he may or may not have been disgusted by what came out with the blue liquid, but he quickly rinsed it all away and swished again with water. First things first, he would need some tea to get rid of that awful taste of whatever was in that awful concoction of dental cleanliness. 

He got out a new disguise that he used as rarely as he could as it required his spring peg leg to be changed to an actual prosthetic that had a foot attached to the end of it, and on that foot was a boot that didn’t match the other one, but who was going to be looking that hard at his foot anyways? Most people were going to be looking for someone with a peg leg, and a distinct walk. It took him just under a half hour adjusting to having another foot again. It felt strange, but once he could walk without tripping a lot, he grabbed some cash, his list of items needed, and hotel key card, stuffed them into a small bag and checked to make sure the windows were locked and that no one was at the peephole. Finally, he set out, just barely remembering to put on his glove over his omnic hand and placing the Do Not Disturb sign on the door handle.

He kept his head down, eyes focused on the ground, his thoughts still spinning around and around his mind with no sense of stopping. Usually he would be busy talking to Roadhog and annoying him with his nonsense and ideas, but he didn’t have that option now. Maybe he had taken the big lug for granted after all, assuming that he would always be there by his side. He grumbled under his breath about how he hated this being alone again, scaring a couple of people that were near him, but he ignored them and kept walking, also trying not to trip over his fake foot. It really had been too long, hadn’t it? The awareness of not being as steady on this prosthetic only added to his anxiety and fear and he hoped no one would recognize him. 

After he got his tea and a couple of sandwiches from a deli, he located a hardware store and when no one was looking, stuffed some piping equipment into his oversized jacket and some other stuff down the front of his pants. At the front, he bought a couple of gallons of paint, just so that he wouldn’t look too suspicious. When the cashier wasn’t looking, he pocketed a few candies too, Roadhog’s favorite kind; a gift of sorts. In another location, he bought alcohol, a couple of packs of soda, and a bunch of other candies and sweets. He would need all the sugar he could get his hands on.

On his way back to the hotel room, he thought he could feel eyes on him, but no matter how hard he looked, trying to pinpoint where exactly this feeling was coming from, he couldn’t see anyone that looked like they were pursuing him. Not good. Not good at all. He quickened his pace and as soon as he was behind the safety of his door, he locked and bolted it, shoving a chair underneath the handle, creating a barricade. With the window, he just kept the curtains shut over it and set the last of his steel traps onto the ground beneath it. He turned the telly back on after retrieving the remote and kept it on a low volume just so that he could have a distraction, yet still be able to hear any knocks or footsteps in the hall that were just a little too close to his door. 

As the evening progressed into night, he forgot about eating, too focused on the task at hand. Once his bombs had been made and completed, he painted them all with little piggy faces instead of his usual smiley faces until the crack of dawn, which was when he collapsed onto the bed and slept, paintbrush still in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently separating these two and watching them fight to get back to each other is a thing for me, why. Part two coming shortly  
> AND I ALSO FOUGHT A HUGE SPIDER DURING A BREAK WHILE WRITING THIS.
> 
> Also, if you want to talk or ask questions or whatever, I'm sicklywarboynux on tumblr, but probably not for long. I'm kind of in the middle of picking a new url, but for now that's where you can reach me u.u


	11. Enth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hear your call to me  
> I'm gonna turn away  
> Cause it was all your fault  
> I'm gonna turn you in  
> Cause it was all your fault
> 
> -Enth by Crystal Castles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said part 2 coming shortly   
> yeha. soRRY

It was day two without Roadhog and everything seemed to be way worse.

Junkrat woke up with little memory of what he had been doing the night before. Must’ve been important, it seemed like he had been painting. He rolled over, the back of his organic hand rubbing away the sleep and grogginess from his eyes, and when he didn’t feel his bodyguard beside him, he jerked up, wide awake and suddenly painfully aware of everything again. Before panic could settle in completely, he jumped up, grabbed everything that he could and started shoving it all into the different bags that were lying around. He needed to keep himself busy and he needed to get going, Roadhog could be anywhere, and he was wasting time in this shithole. His stomach growled loudly, and he growled back at it, shoving more candy into his mouth hoping that would take care of it. It would be smart to grab a cup of tea somewhere just before he left. 

The telly was still on and again the same woman from the day before flashed on screen, distorted though because of the shattered screen, and she was probably reading out the same story as Roadhog’s mask and his own face appeared in the background. He was about to just turn it off when he noticed a clip of Roadhog in custody. Or at least it appeared that way, he kind of regretting throwing the remote so hard. Hesitantly, Junkrat turned up the volume and slumped back onto the bed, assuming the worst. 

“-no one was prepared for the surprise breakout, especially since Rutledge had been seriously injured in the shootout and was not expected to make a full recovery for another week or so. We’ll keep you all updated on the situation once we have more information. As for now, the police advise for everyone to please stay where you are and call them if you see this man in the streets-”

Junkrat tilted his head so that his good ear was facing towards the speakers a bit more. He wasn’t quite sure if he had heard all of that correctly, and he wasn’t about to stay for another ten minutes for the segment to repeat itself. Or maybe he could, just to be completely and absolutely sure. The door was still barricaded, trap left untampered with at the window, and he still needed to figure out how he was going to leave. Usually Roadhog dealt with the front desk people, he wasn’t really good with stuff like that as they had found out the first time they had tried to stay someplace semi decent. He just didn’t have the patience to deal with civvies most of the time, if not all of the time.

As the commercials played, he went back to packing up, and then once the sound of the news intro came back, he rushed straight up to the shattered screen and tried to take in every detail that he could, eyes darting all over the place, just needing to get a bigger picture of what happened that the news anchor couldn’t or wouldn’t say. 

“Welcome back, our top story of the day is about the Australian criminal Mako Rutledge, alias Roadhog, and his breakout from the county jail during the day. He had been under observation due to his injuries sustained in the shootout from a couple of days ago while he and his partner, Jamison Fawkes, alias Junkrat, were robbing some Omnic museum pieces when they were disrupted in the middle of the process thanks to a couple of anonymous tips sent in to the police. Usually sticking together, the two were separated and after three hours, returning fire from Rutledge ceased and authorities moved in and arrested him. Rutledge is currently on the run and said to be armed and dangerous, despite the extent of his injuries. Civilians are advised to stay inside-”

“And get ready for a beautiful reunion! Soon as I figure out where you are, ya big lug, you and I are gonna get out of here, promise you that Roadie. However…” Junkrat trailed off, mind reeling from finally knowing what happened to his bodyguard and best mate. He absentmindedly switched off the telly and took a peek outside, his eyes trying to catch a sign of anything suspicious or out of the ordinary. 

The clock on the little night stand read that it going on 5 in the evening, and the sun was still out, although it was just barely reaching over the surrounding buildings. He shut the curtains again and paced, wondering just exactly what he was going to do, and better yet, how he was even going to find Roadhog. He probably should have listened more to see if any kind of directions were given, but if he knew Roadhog, and he was pretty sure that he did by now, he would be moving to the outskirts of the city towards the town he was in as it was the only place they could agree on after making a run for it. 

Reluctantly, Junkrat decided to wait for nightfall so that he could sneak out of the room better. He just didn’t want to deal with the front desk people, although he was sure they were nice. It would just be too boring, so when the time came, he took everything that he had arrived with, pocketed some of his bombs, and made his exit through the window, forgoing his annoying disguise and also forgetting that his peg leg wasn’t meant for long drops. Whoops.

Thankfully, it didn’t break this time, and while the landing was rough, it didn’t seem to draw that much attention. Now that he was outside, he had absolutely no idea of where to even start. He could hire someone temporarily to take him back to the city, which would be a good idea if he could be sure that the person wouldn’t either turn him in or worse, kill him, although he was pretty sure he could talk that one out. It was good knowing that his life was worth something due to his stupid find. 

So he did just that. He found a bloke that was alone, looked promising, showed him the money, and struck a deal. Within ten minutes he had his own personal temporary chauffeur that got him some tea and a goddamn good sandwich, and was driving him towards the city. About three fourths of the way there, he could hear the rumble of yet another motorcycle about to pass them by on the freeway. His ears perked up because he knew that there was something familiar about the way that it sounded. Something very familiar. He looked over the man’s shoulder, curiosity getting the better of him.

“Huh. That’s a mighty big man comin’ up to us. Say, that...that kind of looks like-”

“Roadie!” 

The sight alone of his bodyguard, partner, _best mate_ was overwhelming, because he was there in front of him and while he may or may not have a soft spot for Roadhog, he didn’t want to give away just how happy he was in that moment. But self control was never something that crossed his mind, not now, not ever. 

He quickly took control of the wheel and jerked the car off to the shoulder of the road, cackling with glee as the man began to scream in terror. They would have flipped if the man hadn’t pushed Junkrat off of him and regained the wheel, slamming on the breaks just in time. Once Junkrat and his stuff was out of his car, he booked it, deciding that it wasn’t worth sticking around to collect his payment. 

The commotion was enough to make Roadhog pull off too, just somehow knowing that his boss was behind all of this. The performance just reeked of Junkrat, and once his suspicions were confirmed, he turned his chopper around and rode up next to the younger man. The giddiness of the other seemed to fade though the closer he got to him, which made him falter in his step as he dismounted.

“You…” 

If looks could kill, Roadhog would’ve died in an instant. Something wasn’t quite right, that was for sure.

“‘Rat?”

“You show up expectin’ me to welcome you back with open arms? Oh no mate, you got some explainin’ to do! You mean to tell me that I basically went out of me way to make everythin’ just right, including washin meself and wearing that shit prosthetic, just for you to break out on yer own? I wanted to blow up the prison! It was a really good plan too, you and I are gonna have a loooong talk, you ain’t getting away with this!”

“…”

Junkrat huffed, shoulders slumping dramatically as he lamented his tale. “Okay, okay, see, I was going to come save yer sorry arse, then we were gonna escape in a really explodey explosion, head for yer chopper, move on to our next stop, wherever that is, and go on about our business! You bloody ruined it! I even painted li’l hog faces on these bombs instead of happy faces to get the message across that they ain’t keepin’ us apart for long! See?”

He roughly shoved a couple of the painted bombs from his pockets into Roadhog’s hand, trying to prove his point further. Roadhog took one of them delicately and held it closer to his mask to see it better, and sure enough, his boss had taken the time and effort to create small pig’s heads on the exterior of the shell. Just for him, because he thought he was worth it. 

“I even bought some alcohol to make some of those molotov cocktail shits or whatever, stuff that was easy to make on the go! I-hold on. No, no ya know what, I know how to fix this,” Junkrat licked his lips a couple of times and clapped his hands together, thinking, and Roadhog knew that look on his face and all the warm bubbly feelings he had going on dissipated as Junkrat’s eyes grew wider and brighter, and that crooked giant smile of his just kept on getting bigger. “There’s only one way to go about this.”

“Boss?”

No answer. Just that stupid grin and the start of a giggle that was sure to turn into a full on laughing fit. His body started to vibrate from pure excitement, the final warning. Uh oh.

“...Junkrat?” 

“We’re going back to the prison! C’mon, we’re gonna do it right this time, I ain’t wasting all of this! I’ll figure out how to use it when we get there!” 

“No!” Roadhog practically roared, grabbing ahold of his charge by the waist and held him up just enough so that his legs weren’t touching the ground anymore. Was he out of his goddamn mind? More than usual? Junkrat squirmed in his grip but didn’t fight against it too much. He had missed the warmth and feeling of the other man and it was good to against him again, despite the fact that with every passing second, Roadhog was having a hard time restraining himself from strangling him.

“Yes! Put me down, ya drongo, and let’s do this. You’ve got no one to blame but yerself, Roadie! I’m payin’ ya, I make the decisions ‘round here, we’re heading back and turning ourselves in, it’ll be fun! You ruined me plans, this’ll make up for it! ‘Sides, I ain’t a medical professional and you look like complete shit. It’d be bonkers to try and find some crooked doc to patch ya up, I dunno even where to look. C’mon, c’mon, before ya cark it!”

“Just shut up, you’re spewin’ nonsense, ‘Rat. Get in and stay there, we’re leavin’.” He dumped him and the luggage unceremoniously into the sidecar and before the other could reorient himself, Roadhog mounted his chopper and revved the engine up, getting a feel of how it was doing before they took off. 

“Awwww you really are no fun at all, mate, a right dinkum killjoy, can’t do anything exciting with you around. Can’t say that I missed that about you, ‘Hog. But! I’ll let it pass if you get some grub, I might actually be dyin’. Been livin’ off of candy and sandwiches, and see this is why you gotta take care of me, I’m hopeless on me own. Ah! Speaking of,” he reached into his pockets again and nudged Roadhog’s arm. “Got you a li’l somethin’.”

Roadhog was about to smack his hand away when he noticed that Junkrat was offering him his favorite treats and that warm feeling started to creep up on him again. 

“Oh, by the way, I’ve got eyes on me after the news got out that they had locked you up, so it’s a good thing you got to take a li’l break, ‘cause I need eyes for those eyes, yeh? Let’s play a game of Cat and Mouse, see how far they make it before the Hog gets ‘em.”

Roadhog let out a deep, throaty laugh as Junkrat reclined in the sidecar, getting comfy as they drove off, together again, hopefully not to be separated again for a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just tell me Junkrat isn't the kind of guy to be pissed off about having his plans ruined even if it's Roadhog that ruined them.
> 
> Okay, here's the thing. I know it's been some time since I last updated, and I can make plenty of excuses as to why, but uh, rly I just kind of lost interest
> 
> But it's back!!!!! I think it's mostly cos I had lost a lot of writing last month right before I went to Comic Con cos I was an idiot and didn't save my work, so basically all the writing I had done, plus some other stuff, was erased when my computer decided to restart without warning lol
> 
> Anyways, I got some more stuff in the works, idk there's a lot!! that i wanna write!! for these two!!!! 
> 
> Still sicklywarboynux on tumblr heyoooo, u can follow me and see what i've been up to. mostly it's listening to cc's new album nonstop and watching animaniacs ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Also: Please give Crystal Castles's new album a listen, Edith is rly good and I wanna support her and also she's a life saver cos of these lyrics lol


	12. So This Guy Walks Into a Bar...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More bounty hunters, more mayhem, not sure what else you were expecting from me at this point ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh, lyrics not now, maybe later or whatever i am a v tired person

The faint light above them flickered, strobing in a way that made Roadhog’s head hurt more than he would like to admit. He never really had this problem before, but maybe this was just a coincidence, or maybe he was just tired and needed more water. Either way, he needed to get up and move around before his body was literally stuck in this position, yet at the same time he couldn’t just leave Junkrat here by himself, it would make him more vulnerable. Roadhog also wanted to avoid the fit Junkrat would throw if he was forced to stop what he was doing and move, and Roadhog wasn’t sure which one was worse: The wrath of the people potentially after them or experiencing the wrath of his employer, a man that always seemed to be a few steps ahead, no matter how hard someone tried to outsmart him. Bombs did help that a lot though.

“Hey, boss?” 

No answer. Just that damn flickering. He waited a couple more seconds, tapping his fingers against the dirty table, littered with glasses and a few plates. Roadhog picked at a couple of food scraps, deciding whether or not it would be wise to throw them at him. It might help. So he did, but they just bounced off of his head without getting any kind of reaction, every single time. Typical.

“Rat?”   

Still nothing. Not even a slight twitch or nod of acknowledgement. He cleared his throat as loudly as he could and yet he still couldn’t get the younger man’s attention if his life depended upon it. And many times had it indeed meant life or death.

“Oh for-Junkrat!”

“Yeah, yeah, I have ears that can hear you, mate, I’m just multitasking, okay? Start talkin’, Roadie.”

“...I _have_ been talking.”

“Huh?” Junkrat quickly glanced up at him, then went right back to work. “Why didn’t you say so?”

Roadhog crossed his arms and slumped back in his seat, fighting back the urge to wring his boss’s neck ‘til his face was a nice purple-blue. He let out heavy sigh in an attempt to keep calm. “I did.”

“Did what?” 

“…”

A quick side look, then back to scribbling away without a care in the world. Typical. “Oh come on, Roadhog, don’t be like that.”

“…”

Agitated, Junkrat slammed down his pencil and dramatically pointed in the direction that Roadhog was probably going to lumber off in, since he had indeed been listening, just was having trouble concentrating at two things at once. “I mean, if you wanna go, then bloody go! But I’m stayin’ right here ‘til I get this straightened out. I’ll be good though, promise!”

“…”

“‘m serious, mate, I’ll be on me best behavior. Nothin’s gonna happen while you’re gone, okay? I just don’t wanna leave this right now, everythin’s gotta be perfect, we can’t have any mishaps with this one. Okay, maybe we can have a couple of ‘em, but that’s not gonna help us any, so if we start out here...no, too much open space...maybe here? I could blow up the entire side of it...just gotta get enough C-4, you can never have enough C-4, obviously. Or we could forget about being subtle altogether and just blow it up entirely, ha! But then we risk losin’ out on the payload if I’m not careful enough, and well, I didn’t lose me arm and leg on accident to not figure out how to make less mistakes, but it’s still a factor...Come on, help a guy out here, would ya? What do ya think? Actually, I’m just gonna draw us here and then I’ll draw an arrow to another position in case we change our minds. Pretty sure we can attack this in any way we want to really, I mean it’s not like we can’t get away with it, we always get away with it, just thought we’d try something different, ya know? Maybe try to be a bit more professional, like that matters at all, but it might down the road, who knows, ya know?”

“…”

Junkrat made a frustrated noise, fully annoyed with his bodyguard by now. “Fine then, will you go? I’ll buy another round or two for ya when you get back, Pigface, just shove off, I’m working! If you hear anything exploding, that’s your cue to step in, got it? Pretty sure I can go five minutes by meself without something happenin’.” 

It took another minute before Roadhog left the booth, simply to take a quick look around him. Finding the coast clear and that there weren’t any obvious threats, he got up and went to take a leak in the bar’s men’s room, leaving Junkrat to himself as he worked tirelessly on a plan in their private(ish) booth in the back. Roadhog knew that it wasn’t the best idea to leave the young Junker alone in public, especially when he was so absorbed in his work that he almost never fully looked up once after getting started, but he knew his charge pretty well, so the chance of letting someone interrupt him when he was this focused meant that at the very least the bar would be left in splinters if anyone tried anything stupid. Which, come to think of it, wasn’t ideal but it would give them both a head start. Like he had said, it would be his cue to step in if anything blew up. 

The only thing Junkrat had been ordering the entire time was tea, ice tea, and soda as he scribbled away in his notebook. He was pretty pumped up for the next gig and had been refusing to eat all night, claiming that he’d get a big meal when he was through. That had been hours ago, and the night had already descended into early morning. The bar owner had come over a few times to check on them, the visits beginning to be more frequent as she prepared her staff to start clocking out. Soon, it was just her and a couple of other men waiting on them since everyone else had gone home, and they all seemed to be getting antsy about their presence. It wasn’t like they weren’t used to them spending time there, heck, they had a deal about Junkrat’s tab that let both him and Roadhog have pretty much everything that they wanted long as he paid it off every two weeks. Still, they weren’t the most ruly of patrons, what with the almost constant bloodshed and destruction that followed in their wake. That was what kept the employees of the bar the most nervous whenever they were around; there was a very strict rule about no bloodshed inside. 

Despite how distracted he was, when he heard everything suddenly quiet down and not return to its banter, Junkrat finally looked up to see what had happened. The lack of noise had pulled him away from his work and it pissed him off greatly. Whatever was going on better be worth it, he was on a roll! Junkrat slurped loudly away at the last of his soda, trying to pinpoint what had been the cause of change in atmosphere. When he laid eyes on several men with guns leisurely walking in, he almost spilled his drink all over his work. He had grown accustomed to Roadhog being there to help cover him when this kind of situation went down, and of course it would happen when he was alone, right after he just assured his bodyguard that he'd be fine. He pulled out a couple of small grenades just in case, hands shaking in anticipation. Adrenaline was starting to course through him, giving him the courage he needed if they approached him, not that he didn’t have the courage to begin with. Roadhog would probably be upset with him about it, but hey, how can a day be complete if something hasn’t blown up? A grin spread across his face and he fought back giggles. 

The apparent leader of the crew gestured something, and the four men closest to him split up while the others stayed near the entrance. He then went up to the owner confidently, handing her a piece of paper with a face and probably an amount of money on the bottom of it. Bounty hunters. There was only one face it seemed, and he could tell it wasn’t his or Roadhog’s since neither of them wore hats. Willingly. Sometimes. They just weren’t compatible with his hair, even if he did sort of like them. 

He relaxed, but kept the bombs on the table in plain view, just in case. They were too far away for him to be able to catch anything with his good ear, and in no time he was back to being absorbed with sketching and making notes of possible ways of attack on their next target. And the next. And then maybe hit an amusement park, they hadn’t done that in awhile.

He was interrupted again, only this time it was one of the waiters, with concern on his face. 

“‘scuse me, sorry to bother you, mate, but he seems like trouble. We can take you out through the back if you’d like-”

Junkrat waved him off. “Nah, no worries, she’ll be right. I’ll have a refill on this and he’s gonna have...another of whatever he’s been drinkin’. What has he been drinking?”

“Just root beer.”

“Eh, make it one of those and a water then, we’re about to leave.”

“Righto. Back in a tic.”

Unfortunately, due to that interaction, the leader spotted him and smirked right before choosing to slowly make his way over to his booth. He grabbed a chair from a table close to them in order to not have to sit in Roadhog’s side of the booth while also blocking him from making a proper escape. The four others followed, making half of a ring, while the rest of the men went outside, on phones. Probably calling in backup, probably calling in for something or someone else. Who knew with these people. The leader cleared his throat before speaking.

“Hello, there. Didn’t think I’d find you here without it already being blown up.”

“Hahaha! Right? But they’re the only place that’ll let me have anything I want, anytime I want and how I want it without complainin'.” Junkrat grinned, finding the entire situation amusing now. “ G’day cobber, what can I do ya for?”

“So, you’re the infamous Fawkes, or rather, Jamison Fawkes. Kind of a formal sounding name for a guy like you. Seems too pretentious for a kid that goes around blowing up stuff for shits and giggles.”

“As long as I’m having fun, ain’t that all that matters in life? And the name’s Junkrat if you’re gonna be addressing me, hunter.” 

“Now ain’t that something.” The man brought out the piece of paper and slid it over to him, ignoring the explosives that were kind of in the way of letting him do so. He didn’t seem to be too fazed by it, which was a little worrisome, however he could also be bluffing. Didn’t matter to the grenade of course. “Tell me, have you seen this man?” 

Junkrat took a good look at the person in question and he squinted, trying to place the face that seemed somewhat familiar with him. He was bad at remembering people’s faces though, but the cowboy hat seemed to ring a bell. “Why would I know him? Bloke looks like he’s some kind of show pony.”

“Due to my vast experience in my field, I know that every outlaw has run into each other at one point or another. Figured I might as well try. Worst you could say is no.”

“Shame then, I don’t know him and I haven’t seen him. Is that all? I’m actually kind of busy at the moment.” 

The other reclined back, sticking his feet up onto the table. It was hard not to think about turning them all into splinters. 

“Doing what, if you don’t mind me asking?” 

Junkrat slammed his pencil down yet again, happy that some of the men around them at least flinched a little at that. “I do mind, actually. Rack off and mind yer own bizzo, I gave you an answer.”

The man leaned in closer, trying to intimidate him further. He really did seem to not be fazed, and it was becoming increasingly clear to Junkrat that he wasn’t dealing with the average bounty hunter, or that he was incredibly good at poker. Either way, it’d be satisfying to see him in pieces.

“See, I’d love to do that, but...we need the truth from you. You know him. I could see it in your eyes, that spark of recognition. I need answers. Now.”

“Listen mate, you ever hear what happened to the other hundreds of bounty hunters after me? ‘Cause it ain’t pretty, and none of ‘em are around anymore to help ya out. Well, they went here and there, but ya know-”

“What you mean, yes, I’ve heard of the stories. Heck, a colleague of mine went after you and your buddy about six months ago and I heard from his mother that the funeral was quite beautiful. Wanted to be cremated anyways. But you can relax, junker, We’re not here for you.”

Junkrat’s full attention was now snatched up by this guy, and he was on high alert. Something didn’t seem quite right, those words usually meant that yes, they were there for him. “Huh? Why not?”

The other man scoffed. “Don’t tell me that you’re actually offended by that, Junkrat. You’re not exactly what I’d call a worthy catch.”

“Well thank you. Long as ya know that you ain’t no prize either, mate.”

“I-”

“And no, it just makes me that much more suspicious. Tell me why I shouldn’t just flatten the place to get you and yer mates outta here.”

“‘Cause we’re just barhopping, looking for a much, much more expensive catch, which happens to be this character of a man. You and your big friend are nothing more than a nuisance in the area, but I can tell that you’re hiding valuable information from me, and I don’t like wasting time.” The sound of the safety being switched off on a gun almost made Junkrat roll his eyes, but he began laughing instead, shaking his head. Of course it was going to be like this. It seemed to only anger the man further, and that just made it even harder to stop ‘til he was hacking and wheezing, his stomach and head hurting from a combination of all the cackling and sugar and lack of actual subsistence. 

“Haha! You-you really expect me to believe this bullshit? Roadie, can you believe this guy? Bloke’s got a dinky little pistol aimed at me head and he says he’s lookin’ for bigger fish!”

The man’s eyes widened and he swiveled around to see that Roadhog had come back, the four men that had been surrounding them in his arms, squirming as they tried to get loose from his suffocating grip. He wasn’t going to budge, not until his idiot charge was safe again. Junkrat beamed at him, grateful that he had finally returned. He’d apologize for this later. 

“What the-?”

“Yeh, he can be real quiet when he wants to be.” Junkrat stood up, closing his notebook and stuffed it into his knapsack. “It can be a li’l unsettlin’ at times, but it just adds to his charm. So, this was a nice li’l chat, mate, but we gotta get goin’. ‘Sides, she really-” 

“For fuck’s sake Junkrat, take that shit out of my establishment!”

“Now you’ve done it, drongo. Sheila wants to go home and you’re preventing her from doing that. Shame on you.”

The leader looked at his men that were slowly starting to have a blue tinge to their faces and sighed, defeated. “Okay. We’re done here.”

Junkrat nodded and Roadhog dropped the men onto the floor, kicking one towards the door. While they struggled to regain their breath, the leader stuffed the wanted notice inside of his pocket and walked over the downed men then right out the door, yelling something to the others. 

“Well, that was interesting. And boring. You good enough to drive, big guy? If not, I’m sure I can convince them to keep the chopper here while I go borrow a car, ya know, since you’ve been drinkin’ all night-”

“Root beer. I’ve been drinking root beer, Rat.”

“Oh...I just heard beer. What? I do me best to listen, don’t I? Not my fault words sometimes skip. Or maybe it is, I should probably start covering me ears more often. Think that's what's causing all that ringing? It keeps getting louder, have I ever told ya that? Never really thought much about that, everything about explosions needs to be experienced in its full glory, am I right, or am I right?”

“…”

“Well? You gonna keep standing there or you gonna go out there and make sure they’ve all left? The chances for him coming back for these fellas seem to be next to nothing! Useless, all of ‘em. At least I know you’ve got my back, you lug, you're the most reliable person I've ever met.”

“Idiot.” Roadhog shook his head, but Junkrat heard the light tone behind the insult and knew that his friend was smiling underneath that mask. 

“Right. I deserved that one. Now I’m gonna order some food, otherwise I’m gonna literally starve to death in the next five minutes, I can feel my stomach caving in on itself already. Least you know everything that I need you to, carry on my legacy when I’m gone, will ya? Wait, you want anything?” 

“…”

“Good, ‘cause I wasn’t gonna get you anything anyways, bastard. Oi! Sheila! Please tell me that the kitchen’s open and I’ll drop another 5 grand next time I pay you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Long time no update, sorry. I still wanna write for these two, I just got rly busy and then also demotivated, and then motivated again, and then became rly attached to McCree which is kind of why...he shows up here
> 
> also it was gonna be longer but i just couldn't figure out a good way to end it and I wanted to update, so this is the result
> 
> Anyways how are y'all doing? 
> 
> Last few months have been pretty hectic, I accidentally got a seasonal job, then struggled in school, and now I have no idea what to do with my life without all that stress other than write???? and draw??????? interesting.


	13. Ta Da

Junkrat blows up some Omnics, Roadhog piles up the remains, and then they fuck on top of it. 

Happy Valentine's Day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An actual update is coming up soon, it's just taking much longer than I thought it would cos it's almost twice as long as a usual chapter for me so yEHA


	14. Lay Down the Law

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We laid down the law  
> So why the hell are you here for?  
> We laid down the law  
> So what you need me for?
> 
> -Lay Down the Law by Switches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which Mei is stuck teaming up with the Junkers and hates it. Also I much prefer the CC remix, cos I love them and Lay Down the Queen sounds much more accurate...
> 
> Based heavily on the episode Pipeline Fever from Archer. If you've seen the episode or recognize some of the dialogue, that's why :v

Mei-Ling Zhou was going to kill him. 

She really was, she had her blaster out and was ready to shoot him point blank in the face with the icicle feature, but that wasn’t why they were here, and there were going to be plenty of opportunities to do so later if he kept being so...Junkratty. Still...it was tempting to split his skull open just to get him to shut up.

She had been called to investigate a bomb threat on a major pipeline that had been built in the middle of a coastal river in Australia. As a scientist that focused heavily on unusual climate changes and was a huge proponent for clean energy and planet, she had mixed feelings on the operation. On the one hand, it gave her a chance to study how the climate was currently adjusting to the fallout of the Omnium Fusion Core radiation, and that was extremely important given the fact that people still lived in the area and were just trying to survive the aftermath. On the other...pipelines were something she frowned heavily upon. There were better and more efficient ways of creating energy these days; oil definitely shouldn’t even be an option anymore. Pipelines were obsolete and dangerous to the environment and ecosystem. Spills were always bound to happen at some point due to insurance coverage usually being twice or more the pipeline’s worth, and oil was tricky to remove from water sources and habitats, reducing the area as a contaminated mess as it suffocated everything it touched.

So in order to protect the environment, she had to protect the already built pipeline from potential damage, empty threat or not. Sometimes you just needed to make compromises in order to keep the world from dimming any further, and she had always been a fighter for doing what was right. As long as it stayed in tact, that was all that mattered. 

Which is why everything became so difficult when she also was informed that she would be teaming up with two notorious criminals, one of which she had for sure thought had been the culprit behind the bomb threats. Why? Because she knew that they hated Omnics, and Omnics still used oil from time to time as a kind of luxury item or something. She wasn’t sure. However, she was proven wrong when they all met up in the office of the company CEO for introductions and tea. Petrol was definitely not something worth wasting here in Australia. After negotiations were made (with lots and lots of yelling, then an offer of tea, and more aggravation until things were finally settled for the Junkers), they were told exactly what needed to happen. 

“Okay. The plan is for Roadhog to patrol the perimeter for anything unusual while we make our way over to the pipeline to set up defense against any incoming attacks.” Mei clarified, hoping to wrap the discussion as quickly as possible. She wasn’t looking forward to anything so far from everyone’s behavior, but she was going to be paid well and was reassured that the environment was definitely the number one priority, especially since it was the wet season. Lots of wildlife needed to be protected during this crucial time period, right after the pipeline.

“Right.”

“If nothing happens, what do we do then?”

“Then you report back here and just be ready to come back in case the bombers want to try again another time. With our intel team, threats rarely go unnoticed, even if mentioned in the subtlest of forms. We cannot afford to have this pipeline blow, it will put hundreds out of a job.”

“And ruin a rather large, delicate and valuable ecosystem.” Mei asserted, still not fully convinced that the CEO was able to even grasp the concept of corruption. Plus she was sure that he thought he could lie to her face and get away with it, but she knew that he was just using the jobs line to try and convince her that he really did care about the people that worked underneath him instead of this being about trying to save the exploitation of their labor so that he could stay a rich oil mogul.

“Yes, of course, whatever you say, love.” The suited man stood up and showed them the door, reminding them of the reward for doing such a brave thing and that they were going to be given the company boat in order to reach their destination. It was sure to be stolen by the end of this trip. 

________________________________

“Okay, you’ve got this, Roadie. Keep an eye on the air too, yeh? Aerial attacks aren’t likely but who knows with these people.” 

Roadhog gave his charge a huge thumbs up and Junkrat gave him one last head butt and slap on the back before climbing onto the platform of the pipeline with Mei. She was too busy unloading her own gear to notice what Junkrat have brought with him, but it was a good guess that it involved dangerous substances and sensitive material that she did not want to accidentally trigger. When she looked up to see Roadhog leave in the boat, she only really saw a large cooler that he immediately sat on, resting his peg leg on his good knee. Not for sharing. 

“Well...there he goes. That lug oughta make sure to stick to the schedule, I don’t like it when he’s too far. Nerves an’ all that.”

“I take it you two are close then?”

“Erm…not very...” He wasn’t really paying attention as he wanted to make sure that his best mate wasn’t going to be ambushed. He kept his eyes locked on the boat and even when it was out of sight it was hard to look away. 

“Then why-”

“I mean he’s probably like half a click away by now, he takes his job very seriously. ‘s why I hired him! No one I’ve ever come across knows what they’re doing, but Roadhog? He’s exactly the kind of bloke I’ve been looking for. No one messes with him, especially when I’m around.”

“So, you’re confident nothing will get by him?” Mei took off her glasses and cleaned them off, knowing fully well that she’d need to be on high alert during this entire ordeal. Whether or not the threat came at all today, she just had a gut feeling that nothing about this operation would be straightforward when working with these two. 

“Not a single thing. But if something were to get past him, he’s fired and he knows that. Although…”

“Although what?”

“The salties ‘round here could give him more trouble than anything else but again, I’d fire him even if he died. Would be a right pain in the arse to fight these shits to get his poor corpse back though. I’ve heard they got a thing for piggies. Heh.”

“How noble.”

“Too right! Now, havin’ said all’a that, don’t sit on the edge of this thing.”

“Sorry, what? Why?”

“Crocs enjoy tryin’ to catch things.”

Immediately, she pulled her legs back up and moved to what shade she could find, setting up an area to keep watch in, using her jacket as a makeshift blanket. She knew that it was going to be hot, but muggy? Even worse. Out of the extreme kinds of weather in the world, she would much rather have to put on more layers than feel like she would need to peel her skin off too. 

Time went by and it involved a lot of pacing on his part every now and then. It was only when he suddenly stopped dead in his tracks that she stiffened and grabbed her equipment, just in case.

“Oh look, a dingo!”

“Where?” Before she could get a good look at the rare sight for her on the edge of the river, a pair of jaws shot out from the water and snapped themselves tightly around the poor animal’s torso. She cringed at its pitiful cries before it was silenced by the water after being dragged under.

“Well. There was a dingo.” 

Mei took off her glasses and squinted through them, could tell that they were clean, and then readjusted them on her face. “Was...was that really a crocodile?” 

“Yeah, they’re wicked big out here since they’re free to go out and about in the ocean. Some stick around all year but the biggest ones are the real travelers.”

“Huh.”

“Oi, do you really think that someone would try and beat me to blowin’ this thing up?”

He must’ve thought that because she had engaged in a sort of conversation outside of stuff relating to their job, she would find this next subject to be just as interesting. And unfortunately, it was, because nothing was making sense to her. 

“Sorry, let me just get this straight. You said that you were going to blow up this pipeline, yes?”

“Yes.”

“But then you changed your mind-”

“Got arrested, not much I could do there actually.” Junkrat flicked whatever gunk he got out of his ear at the water below them, a large grin starting to spread across his face as he remembered all the fun that had been.

“Broke out, committed more crimes, came back here, and then was asked to guard this exact same pipeline that you wanted to blow up? By the same man that wanted you to put you back in jail?”

“Sounds ‘bout right.”

“I’m sorry, but how and why does that make any sense to you at all?”

“Eh, figured that Roadhog and I should try and go legit, ya know? ‘s just been a thought, we’ve been doing stuff together for so long that we’ve got ourselves quite the rep! Couldn’t hurt to try, this is really the only way I’m ever gonna get a real job. ‘Sides, this is my pipeline to blow up, not anyone else’s, I’ve had me eye on this thing for the longest time, but ya didn’t hear that from me. Soon as I’m done blowin’ up the eco terrorist, I’m gonna rig this up and go out with a bang whether you like it or not!”

She sighed and curled her knees up to her chest, trying to stay in the shade as much as possible now that the sun was growing higher. “If only…”

“What was that?”

“I said if only I had brought more gear, I could be doing something productive. Even something as simple as doing temperature readings throughout the day would make this bearable.” 

“Pft, I wouldn’t worry about it honestly. I’d tell ya that being out here at night would be more dangerous than being out here durin’ the day, but since you were an icicle for a long time I’m sure you’re used to a little cold. But I’d bet a thousand dollars that a bunyip would do ya in.”

“I was in cryostasis!”

“Same thing, really. An icicle freezes in the middle of dripping and you froze in the middle of working!” 

“How-Never mind, let’s just figure out a plan.”

They talked for a long time, coming up with various scenarios that this eco terrorist could possibly put them through, which led to discussions about how to counteract each possibility with the resources that they had. She had her blaster that she was going to use to freeze them in their place and was able to conjure up a protective wall that would buy them enough time for Roadhog to come back and help them. He had his bombs and grenades and other thingamabobs that he planned on using, but...he was also wasting them by just throwing them around into the air, cackling gleefully at the resulting explosions, big or small. When Mei asked if he had thought to maybe stop and think about replenishing everything soon, he said that he had loads of supplies that he could use to reload...except that he had left his gear bag with Roadhog on the boat, and he wasn’t due back for a check in for another two hours. Soon as he began spewing out sentences relating to his bodyguard or about the theoretical explodey things he could make with the stuff in his gear bag, she had had enough. The sight of the blaster pointed between his eyes didn’t really deter him, but it did get him to calm down enough for him to start looking through his pockets for any backups he might have missed. Apparently he had because he managed to find one lonely grenade, marked with a sad face on his person.

“Are you going to use that as a counter attack until Roadhog checks in?” Mei lowered the blaster gun, giving up her threat in favor of hope. Long as he was going to contribute and stop rambling about stuff she didn’t care about or want to even try care about, she would let him live. For now.

“What, this? ‘s a dud unfortunately.” Junkrat tossed it into the lake lazily and was about to say something else when there was a muffled boom, and a small wave of water splashed onto the platform, missing them both completely as they scrambled back to avoid it, but just barely. Small pieces of...something, landed on the platform as well, drenched in red. Blood.

“Crikey! Then where did-Oh. Oh no.” 

“What? Now what, what did you do!” 

“Blew up a bloody goddamn animal is what I did, with me last working bomb! Thought I had put it in me left pocket but apparently I was wrong.”

“Uh...Junkrat?”

“What?”

“Um…”

He looked up when he realized that she wasn’t going to finish her thought anytime soon, and then snapped his head in the direction of where she was pointing, eyes widening as he guessed correctly what she was so terrified of. 

“Right. Okay. So, uh...Roight. Not good.”

Thrashing in the water below them was a giant salt water crocodile, writhing in pain after losing a back limb and a small portion of its abdomen. Mei looked down at the chunks of flesh and scales on the platform in disgust, but when the tune of the croc’s hissing changed to something more menacing, she looked to Junkrat to see what they would need to do now, because in her honest opinion, it was time to leave. Now. Screw this particular ecosystem, it would probably continue to thrive even if oil filled it up.

Despite that, he had decided to crawl to the edge of the platform and scream at it.

“Oh for cripessake, piss off! Go on, shoo! Cry about it elsewhere, we ain’t got the time for this! Unless you’re gonna be any help in protectin’ my pipeline, I don’t wanna hear about it, ya mongrel.” 

It growled in response, puffing out its throat and creating a sound that reverberated against the metal and through Mei’s soul. It was hard not to start panicking, and she was sweaty enough as it was. The extra scent of fear was far from helpful. Junkrat on the other hand, wasn’t as shaken, however he did start to move away from the edge, as if remembering what exactly it was that they were dealing with. 

“An’ if you jump up on here, I’m blowin’ off your lower jaw next! See ya try ‘n chomp on anythin’ after that, eh?”

“But we’re too far up for them get on here, aren’t we?” She really didn’t think that she would be resorting to shrieking, but here she was, clinging to the hot metal piping so that she was as far back as possible from the edge of the platform, upset and scared for her life.

“Of bloody course not, Mei, they use their tails to jump up on here all the time to sun ‘emselves. Luckily for us, he’s more likely to stay in the water ‘cause it’s too bloody hot otherwise, this would end up burnin’ ‘em. Small miracles and all that.”

“Yes. Lucky us.” She could still feel her heart pounding in her chest and even after the croc had returned to the depths of the murky river, she couldn’t seem to calm down. Every ripple below them scared her, every guttural sound that echoed around them sent shivers down her spine, and every time a crocodile surfaced in order to breathe, she froze, assuming it was the injured one calculating its retaliation. “At least crocodiles don’t like to eat humans, right? They prefer normal food, like fish and small mammals. Right?”

“Who am I, Crocodile Dundee?”

“Sorry...”

They sat there in silence for a half hour at most, processing the situation they had gotten themselves into. Or rather, just how Junkrat got them into this mess in the first place by wanting to blow up this stupid pipeline in the middle of a river in Australia during the wet season, because he wanted to. No other reason, just because he wanted to! Who did he think he was? A terrorist in his own right, and a bully. There was no way she was working with him ever again, never ever.

Eventually, due to the heat getting them both, Junkrat pulled out the cooler, opened it up and offered her a look inside. 

“Want any tea? Lemonade? I’d offer beer but that’s Roadhog’s, so ‘s off limits.”

“No, thank you, but I’ll take some water if you have any.” 

“Hm. I might have some-”

“It’s okay, I’ll get it myself.”

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Junkrat warned, pulling the cooler away from her, ignoring her protests. “Used dry ice instead of regular ice.”

“Really?” She was skeptical at first, but it dawned on her that it was actually a pretty good idea, considering how the sun was affecting the temperature of the outside of the cooler. She could just make out small heat waves coming off the plastic. 

“Yeh. Otherwise it’d all just melt and warm up and I didn’t bring ice tea out here for it to spoil. Least you got the gloves for digging around in here, I just gotta hope that me mechanical hand doesn’t right up freeze and break off. Or rather, you did have the gloves.”

“Yes, so would you please stop and focus? There is a giant, wounded crocodile out there, not to mention a dangerous eco terrorist!”

“Oh bugger, I totally forgot about him.” He didn’t even bother to look up to check their surroundings, just scratched his head as he figured out what he wanted. Maybe something sweet, but maybe a little fizz wouldn’t hurt either. Choices, always with the choices. Oh.

“Ugh…” She massaged her temples in order to try and stay patient with him, which was just becoming extremely hard to do with each passing moment. “I didn’t.” 

“Yeah but that’s even more of a reason for you to get on board with me new plan!”    “…Is it as idiotic as your other plans?” Probably. There was no doubt about it at this point. First he has his bodyguard split from them to the point that they rarely caught a glimpse of him as he patrolled, then he tosses his last bomb into the lake and angers the biggest saltwater croc she had ever seen, and now he was going to try again to convince her that he could come up with something that would help them out.

“Er, that’s how brainstorming works, Mei! It’s freeform, you come up with a lot of...ideas.”

“Like using the pipeline as a way to set the entire swamp on fire?” Hopefully, he would pick up on the sarcasm. His excited face and bright eyes told her that he didn’t. 

“Which, yeh, is obviously a bloody brilliant idea, but it got me thinking about chemical reactions.” 

“Such as radiation’s affect on the brain?” That one earned her a scowl and she flinched away from him. A touchy subject then that she was sure to never mention again. “Sorry.”

“No, like the reaction between solid carbon dioxide, also known as dry ice of which we have plenty, and a fun, sexy little molecule that I like to call dihydrogen monoixde.”

Mei raised an eyebrow in growing confusion. “...Water?”

“Water.” Junkrat nodded enthusiastically, draining two beer bottles into the water below. He then slammed one of them against a metal rod and scooped up some dry ice with the neck of it all while she watched in curiosity. Finally, he lined up the lips of both bottles and tapped them together gently so that the dry ice broke up and fell into the unbroken one. When he was satisfied, he just dropped the makeshift scoop into the cooler and presented it to her. “Combine them in a sealed container and you have yourself a-”

“Some kind of dry ice bomb?” Mei blurted out, excited about the prospect of actually being able to defend themselves again. 

“Ugh, yes, Ruiner of Explanations! I was building up to that, but yeh.” 

“Well, we got plenty of water.” 

They both looked out to the river and made a face for different reasons. Hers was because she was scared of what lay beneath it and she for sure did not want to try and get a cup of water from that. He didn’t look all that thrilled either.

“No, the lake’s too dirty. It’s full of whatever crocs shit out which I can only assume is people.”

“They don’t eat people.” Mei muttered, trying to reassure herself more than anything else. 

“They eat people all the time! Look at ‘em wankers, they absolutely eat people. One moment you’re dippin’ a toe in to see if the water’s gonna provide you any relief from the heat and next, wham! It bites yer leg and tosses ya ‘round like a rag doll ‘til it can get a nice chunk outta ya. Seen it happen to an old friend once. If I ever see him again I’m gonna tell him that we match and that between the two of us we can share a pair of boots now. Wonder if he ever went with a peg leg like me or made something else. Chances are that that piker moved to the city and got a proper leg from an Omnic. You know, the kind that are really shiny and fancy and probably bugged to kill you if you hate Omnics. Easily hacked, too. Speakin’ of-”

“Oh my gosh, okay. So if the croc water is too dirty-”

“Yeh, we need distilled water.”

“Does your plan include finding some? Because I will not allow you to dip into my water reserves for my blaster since it’s the only real weapon we have left.”

“Yes, but…”

“But what?”

“You’re not going to like it.”

“...Do we have to distill our pee?”

“I guess you can if you want, but I was uh, gonna use this.” 

She watched in horror as he dug a little deeper into the cooler and pulled out a huge bottle of water. 

“There was bottled water in there the whole time?” 

“Haha yes, sorry I forgot…”

“You. Forgot.” Her throat immediately began to feel even dryer, if that was even possible at this point as she knew that she was well beyond parched, as soon as he pulled out the glass container. She tried to reach out for it, but he shook his head and kept it out of her reach by standing up straight to reach his full height and just dangled it above her with his organic hand, mockingly.

“What? It’s not like you didn’t have other choices for drinking, mate. Here, check this out.”

Mei tried to understand what he was talking about as he poured a little bit of water in, shaking the bottle slightly so that the two ingredients mixed together as equally as possible. She had a vague idea of what was going to happen, but since making spontaneous bombs weren’t her forté, she kept quiet, even when he shoved it into her face as if he was making sure that she appreciated his geniusness. 

“Wait, how do you light it?”

“You don’t. Pressure just builds up until it explodes.” 

Thoroughly worried now since her hypothesis of him not knowing 100% what he was doing most of the time was unfortunately proven right, she started to take a few steps back in caution, wishing that there was a better place to hide without risking a surprise swim. “How long does that take?”

“Depends on how much water you add, we’re gonna have to dial it in.” 

“So you have no idea when that’s gonna go off?”

“How could I?” A fizzing sound caught both of their attentions, and when they realized that it was coming from the bottle, Junkrat threw it straight up into the air to get rid of it as fast as possible. “Oh shit!”

Mei closed her eyes and ducked just in time to avoid getting the tiny glass specks in her eyes as the remnants of the bottle rained down on them. Soon as she thought it was safe again, she marched up angrily to the fool, fists balled up. 

“You...asshole!”

“Shit, did it get ya?” The worry was genuine but the entertained smile on his face made it hard to believe that he actually cared all that much. She rolled her eyes and checked.

“No.” All she had to do was wipe off the glass that had clung to her clothing, thankfully. Nothing had pierced her exposed skin, and the dry ice had already evaporated enough to the point that if there was any on her, she couldn’t feel it burning her either.

“Whew, me neither. Again, small-”

“Don’t.” Mei slapped his hand away as he tried to place it on her shoulder. 

“Miracles!”

“Ugh!”

“How long was that?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot to time it!” 

“It’s okay, I forgot to measure it. So we’re both gonna need to do better.” Junkrat turned to the cooler and restarted the process, carefully mixing the water and dry ice together, this time not putting as much of either ingredient into yet another emptied beer bottle. From what she knew of Roadhog, he was not going to like coming back to a half empty cooler and she refused to be a part of that upcoming argument. Defeated, she sat back down on her jacket and chose to help him time the explosions. 

By the time they had managed to come up with a decent formula that gave them enough time to make the improvised bomb and throw it a good distance while Mei put up her ice wall, Roadhog had come back to give them a report of his patrol, which wasn’t really much of anything. It didn’t seem like the terrorist was coming any time soon and the sun was setting, meaning that their shift was over. Roadhog was of course not too happy to know what Junkrat had been doing while he was gone, but mostly he just gave a huge sigh and let the other prattle on and on about what had happened as they made their way back, and how he had to fight off a croc with his bare hands. Er, hand.

In the grand scheme of things, Mei did appreciate how resourceful Junkrat could be, even though that’s what he had to be in order to have made it this far in life. She also didn’t mind how off-putting Roadhog could be at times, knowing fully well that until she gained his trust, he would view her as a potential threat to his boss. It didn’t matter though because as soon as she was paid, she broke ties and moved on to figuring out what next to do, never thinking that she would ever see the pair again. She had decided that even if the company preferred her to look after their pipeline, she would just refer them to someone else. 

She didn’t mesh well with heat and stupidity anyways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If nothing makes sense i'm sORRY i'm posting at like...3 in the morning..........i'll look for any continuity errors when i'm more awake or something
> 
> SOOO i got accepted into my dream college and have been focusing on making sure that the transfer process runs as smoothly as it can!!! :D
> 
> I kind of wanted to make this a two parter but then thought better of it, so yeha, long chapter. I'm working on other stuff too, like Roadhog's birthday and just little every day shenanigans, like them reacting to being woken up by loud construction work too early in the goddamn morning :)))))) (hint, it's based on my experience)
> 
> I also wrote this cos I'm extremely pissed about pipelines as one is going right through my homestate and it upsets me greatly. I don't want to go into rant mode in the notes so if you want to talk or learn more, my tumblr is still the same, sicklywarboynux, heyo


	15. Bombs Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This has happened more than once.

Sometimes you just accidentally run into problems, sometimes you intentionally do so, and others it just kind of happens whether or not you want it to. This was none of those times. Or more accurately, it was all of them combined. In his mind, it canceled out in the end. 

They were standing in a building on the edge of a town that they had planned on emptying out to get to the valuables but were met with yet another set up it had seemed. Lots and lots of police types that tried to stop them, but didn’t have the chance. Like they usually did, they had scouted out the place while Junkrat made “detailed” (drawings count too, ya know) notes about potential bomb placements and after the first detonation it had appeared that everything was clear. As they rushed in, it didn’t take long to be surrounded and pulverized by attacks that had clearly been planned out to counter them, making sure to hit their weak spots and even getting them to separate at one point. Unfortunately for those not the dynamic duo, no one was going to make it out alive. 

“It’s always so hard to remember whose blood is whose. Is this mine? Is this yours? Is this theirs? Does it really matter? Roadie, we’re all gonna die at some point, do I really need to be this worried? I think I should be at least a smidge worried. Last I checked, blood was a biohazard, but what isn’t these days?” Junkrat flicked a piece of brain matter off of his shoulder, absentmindedly licking his upper lip over and over again to see if he could get wipe off some blood off of his face that way. He was pretty sure it was his though as he had been punched a couple of times in the head and face. Everything was sure to hurt later more so than it did now. “Answer me, mate, make small talk with me, I feel like ’m dyin’ when I don’t hear yer sweet voice for so long. ‘Specially after that hit to the head, that seemed like a doozy to me, but you’re up and movin’ so...you got anymore of that hog juice stuff on ya? Looks like you might need a top up. Do you feel sleepy?”

Roadhog grunted and walked over to his boss, a little unsteady on his feet. He’d been right, the hit had been pretty bad as it had knocked some of the glass out from his gas mask, but as long as things didn’t start to double up in his vision, he should be fine for the time being. Definitely as long as he didn’t see more than two Junkrats, he definitely couldn’t handle that right now, not after what they’d just been through. 

“Long answer: You’re going to get yourself killed sooner rather than later if you keep doing this, so yes. Short answer: No, you don’t and yes, I do, and no, I’m not,” He grabbed ahold of the smaller man’s chin and inspected the cuts to his lip and forehead, then had him turn around to see what else had been damaged before getting out their repair kit. “Hold still, stop with that...licking, ‘s disgustin’ and shut up.”

“Wait, wait, wait, is all of this mine then?” Junkrat gestured wildly, tilting his head to the side as Roadhog began to clean him up somewhat with a rag. “I don’t think I got hit as hard as you did, the only thing killin’ me is me side.”

“No. And that’s ‘cause you got sliced up.”

“Ah. So none of this is mine.” 

“No.”

“Some of it is mine?”

“Yes.”

“Which parts then, exactly?” another lick over his lips, his face contorted with confusion. He really needed to stop.

“...I can’t remember, it was mostly a blur. Just hold still, ‘Rat,” he grabbed his left arm and forced it to the other’s waist and squeezed, kind of enjoying the whimper he made from the pain. “You’re making this more difficult than it has to be.”

“Okay, okay, sorry I’ll-Listen, mate, just-Hey!” The metal arm smacked him on the chest, harder than he probably intended but this wasn’t the time to get pissed. Something caught Junkrat’s attention and he loosened his grip significantly, letting him wriggle free from his grasp. 

“What?”

“Shh! Listen,” he tilted his head in the direction he heard the noise and gestured for Roadhog to copy, which he did, but nothing seemed to be amiss that he could tell. 

“…”

“Shut up for once ‘Hog and put yer ears to use, somethin’s not right.”

“…”

“What? Seriously mate, be quiet, do ya hear that?”

“...chirps.”

“Omnic chirps, the bastards. Must’ve called for more backup once they saw what we did to their superiors. Bloody idiots, they don’t stand a chance, but I welcome the opportunity for more scrap!” 

Roadhog shoved Junkrat out of the way and pulled out his gun, looking for debris to load it with. “Wait here-”

“No, no, no, no, no, you’re injured, Roadie. Sit tight an’ patch up, I’ll go check it.”

“I’m your bodyguard, idiot-”

“And you’re useless if I lose you.” Junkrat grabbed ahold of the nose of Roadhog’s mask and pulled down hard. Roadhog let out another grunt in disapproval and in warning, but they locked eyes and he calmed down knowing that his boss was being serious and not messing around like usual. “I need you just as much as you need me, ya big lug. Just do what I say and we’ll be fine, hm?”

Roadhog froze but eventually complied and sat down in a clearing, taking out spare wraps to cover any open wounds left after the hogdrogen was used up. He worried about his head because it was throbbing and it felt like his brain was expanding, but mostly he was concerned with Junkrat’s safety. He had a point; he was useless to him if he was dead, and he definitely needed him alive. How else was he going to get paid? Who else was going to make him feel and treat him as good as he did? Roadhog shook his head, lifting up the mask and inhaled, instantly feeling the healing effects. The throbbing didn’t stop altogether, but it did slow, and the sleepiness went away for the most part. The other wounds healed up nicely, but a large gash on his back hadn’t closed all the way. Of course it would be one where he needed the runt’s help, and he was too busy being lookout to hear him call out. 

A couple more minutes went by and he could start to hear the chirping more clearly now, along with verbal communication from the mechanical filth. He couldn’t make out what they were saying, but it seemed like they were beginning to split up, which wasn’t good. They’d be surrounded again and he was no where near prepared for another attack like that again. On top of that, he heard the sound of a sprinting Junkrat, the desperation of his uneven steps almost making them sound foreign. Once again he was on edge and stood up, grabbing whatever was closest and stuffed it into his gun. 

“Roadhog, you’re gonna wanna be wrappin’ up that patch job right now and revvin’ up the bike,” the laugh that followed was borderline nervous, but there was a tinge of excitement with it too. The look in his eye also made it obvious that adrenaline was kicking in again. What did he know?

“What’s going on, ‘Rat?” 

“A lot. Gotta move fast, I think I’m gonna be off with this blast radius estimate by at least a couple hundred meters. It’ll give us a good head start but it looks like we’ve got ourselves some flyers with guns. Nothin’ too showy but it’s gonna put a damper on us for sure after this mess.”

“Shit.”

“You’re tellin’ me. Go on ahead, I’ll catch up, promise. Take what you can though, don’t wanna go empty handed, not after all of this.”

Roadhog’s head turned sharply and he could feel the intense glare boring into him. It didn’t matter though, they needed to get out of there right quick. 

“Don’t look down at me with that nose of yers, heifer, go on, shoo!” With a wave of his hand, he dismissed his partner and began setting up his plan, throwing mines here and there haphazardly, almost hitting Roadhog in the stomach with one. 

Not wanting to get into an argument, Roadhog did what he was told and loaded everything he could onto his motorcycle, then gunned it out of the area. Junkrat would catch up with him later, he said. He kind of had an idea of what he was planning on doing, and he was not happy about it. If his boss lived through this, he’d get the worst of what was on Roadhog’s mind about his stupidity and then some. 

He slowed down once he had reached a fair distance and turned, waiting. Every moment was too long and he fought the urge to go back. Junkrat would take care of this. He always did, he always managed to get out of everything life threw at him, and this time wouldn’t be different. It needed to not be different. 

It only took three seconds after he finished his thoughts for him to see something fly into the sky with a trail of smoke behind it, and another two seconds before he witnessed the building they had just been in to turn into rubble before his very eyes. The blast from the building might have propelled his boss more towards him, but he wasn’t going to make it, and from that height, he was bound to kill himself from the fall. 

Roadhog took off, forcing the engine to reach a high speed as fast as it could go so that he could make it to the spot he thought Junkrat would fall on, but the closer he got, the louder he could hear yelling and he slowed down. Of course. 

Another object was thrown in the air behind him and when it went off, Junkrat was again blasted up and forward, but this time falling at a much safer distance. Roadhog still gunned it and snatched him before he reached the ground. The force made him stumble back a bit and remember that he was still injured, but he stabilized and waited for his boss to say something. 

Instead, Junkrat just wrapped his arms around Roadhog’s head and hugged him to his chest, cackling, and he swore he felt some kisses against his mask a couple of times. 

“See? What’d I tell you when we first met, Roadie? Ain’t I quite the catch?”

“…”

“Oh c’mon, mate-”

He was interrupted by a rumbly laugh that made him join in, and a tight squeeze reaction from his bodyguard that reminded him of his strength. The belly beneath him quivered for some time even when he managed to compose himself and from what he could see of his eyes, Roadhog even teared up a little bit. Junkrat could stay like this all for the rest of the day if he could. 

Eventually Roadhog calmed down and loosened his grip on him. Just as he was about to let him go, he noticed how freely Junkrat’s peg leg flopped about.

“Did your leg break again?”

“What are ya talkin’ about, ‘Hog, no it didn’t-” Soon as he put the peg down on the ground, it shot out from under him and he lost his balance, landing flat on his ass. “Shit!”

Roadhog couldn’t help himself and bellowed with more laughter at his boss’s misfortune. It was somehow still funny even after witnessing it happen endless times beforehand. 

“Yeh, yeh, whatever, get me some tools so that I can fix it, lard arse, we ain’t goin’ no where until it works again. Stupid, bloody mechanism, can’t even stand a two part explosion. Oi, make a note of lookin’ for stronger steel and springs, would ya? Anythin’ that makes this thing able to stand the heat is what I want.”

“Sure thing, boss. Sure thing.”

_____________________

 

Later that evening, curled up by the fire pit they had made in their temporary campsite, Junkrat sprang up and rushed over to a sleepy Roadhog who was just going to retire to bed in a few moments. However, the sudden ball of energy that was charging made him wake up some and put him on high alert, especially when he felt his mask being tugged on again and he was met with an eager face. 

“You know what I wanna do?”

“What?” He pushed him away gently, just to get the message across that he wasn’t interested in Junkrat being in his space for the time being.

“Have a proper night out. C’mon, it’s been awhile anyways, Roadhog. Let’s go grab some grub at some fancy schmancy place and see where the night takes us. I think we deserve some kind of pamperin’ as of late.”

Roadhog grunted in agreement, still feeling the sleepiness starting to crawl back into place, but if his boss wanted to move then he needed to go with him, like always. Besides, he did deserve to be pampered. 

“I’m thinkin’ of somethin’ that civvies are willing to pay big bucks for. Filet mignon, expensive wine from France, fine dining and the like, heck, even crummy salad with aged cheese!”

“You don’t even like to drink wine.”

“I know but it’s the thought that counts,” He paused once they were both next to the bike and looked up, eyes going wide and body going slack as he took in the familiar sight of the milky way. Somehow it still got him caught up in its beauty. All those stars out there, just big balls of fire and gas and explosions...

“What?” Every time he got that far away eyed look on his face, Roadhog’s blood pressure and heart rate went up and he instinctively grabbed for his gun. “What is it now?”

“How old are you anyways?”

“...What does that have to do with anything?” He asked, mildly annoyed now and ready to call it quits for their plan. It had been such a long day, he just wanted to sleep at this point, his head killed. 

Junkrat looked over his shoulder with a huge grin on his face and he felt the tension in his body melt because it was That Grin, the one that made him feel special and appreciated and loved. “‘Cause it’s yer birthday today, Mako, didn’t you remember?” 

Every time he thought he could predict what the runt would do, he went and did or said something from left field and it would knock the wind out of him, either literally or figuratively. This one somehow did both, and it probably had something to do with the mention of his actual name. 

“And I’ve got just the present for ya! Wait here! But start the engine, we should get to the city at a decent hour, just after kitchens close so that I can stir somethin’ up for us! No need for reservations!”

Present. Junkrat gave him gifts all the time on top of the pay that he got and for birthday gifts he usually went all out. What was it going to be this year? He took a seat on the motorcycle and started it up like he was told and waited patiently. From what he could see of their hideout and what he could hear, Junkrat must’ve hidden it and then forgot where he put it because it sounded like he was tearing up the place. After yet another crash he made the decision to go in and see what the hell the runt was up to but then he came staggering out triumphantly with...

A huge stack of Pachimari plushies of all sizes to add to his collection as well as a pig plushie with ROADR8GE on the collar of it from what he could see. It took a lot of strength to not scream in excitement, but he had to have let out some sort of noise because Junkrat began to snicker. 

“I’ve been savin’ ‘em for today! Wha’daya think, Roadie? Happy birthday!” 

Roadhog immediately took them away before they could catch on fire or explode or even just drop on the ground and hugged them all to his chest while his lenses fogged up. It was beautiful. So beautiful. He’d be sleeping with them all tonight, especially the pig one that he was planning on naming Mako Junior. 

“No need to thank me, big guy. Now put those things with yer stuff and let’s get outta here, my stomach’s cavin’ in from eating itself alive! C’mon, c’mon, before the kitchens bin the scraps! Don’t want another meal out of that, do ya? ‘specially cheese, I don’t care how old it is, I don’t like it when cheddar turns into that bleu stuff if I know it’s supposed to be cheddar.”

Another grunt in agreement and some time to carefully place the new additions in his pile. When he came back he gave Junkrat a little hair ruffle and head rub that resulted in a nice moan that made him smirk in return and they were off yet again, bathing in the starlight of their home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm not dead :v
> 
> Thank you for reading, like always!


	16. Impossible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Take what you want from me  
> It means nothing now  
> Take everything from me  
> It means nothing now  
> Not so easy to forgive, harder to forget  
> Take what you want.
> 
> -Impossible by Anberlin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of sad???? Hurt/comfort??????

After their dinner together, Junkrat had immediately bounced away to his work station with a cup of coffee, the first of many, and was babbling on and on about his plans for the night that seemed to be about more bomb tinkering and drawing up drafts for a future heist once they left Australia again. Roadhog initially had drowned out the talking by working on keeping up his motorcycle maintenance, but after a few minutes of silence, he realized that Junkrat had downed four more cups along with some tea and therefore was so completely absorbed in his work that he had shut down anything that basically wasn’t his brain and hands. Moments like these were greatly appreciated, but it did always feel slightly off, not hearing his voice every other second. It was good background noise that helped him focus, as much as he didn’t like to admit it. He tried to continue on, but his joints were telling him that it was time to get some sleep, and he couldn’t find a good excuse to ignore them, especially when he straightened out his back and felt most of his spine crack in a satisfying manner. 

Roadhog went outside his home to get some fresh air and felt his age bear down on him. It wasn’t too late in the evening, but the winter nights were cruel to his lungs and bones and while he still had solid muscle on him, he wasn’t in his twenties anymore. Being with Junkrat made him feel like he was though, or at least in his thirties, but he had to keep reminding himself that no, he was reaching 50 soon. He had been alive for almost 50 fucking years and had done so much in this life already and it was nowhere near over. Hopefully. He’d been on the brink of death whoever knows how many times and most of those times had been because he was protecting Junkrat or got injured during their many shenanigans together. He smiled fondly. He wouldn’t have it any other way, he was having the most fun he’d had in a long time and it was all thanks to that fateful day when they met. That had been a wonderful day. Junkrat’s face had lit up when he threw the first punch and had looked upon him with adoration and slight fear afterwards, but it was the fact that he had stuck around after Roadhog made a firm offering that made him realize the partnership would last.

He slipped back inside, put away his tools for the time being and wiped the bike down, occasionally looking over at Junkrat just to make sure he was doing okay. It warmed his heart seeing his partner be so focused and passionate, doing what he did best. It made him wonder what the kid would have been like without having to have dealt with their part of Australia blowing up in a revolution he had been a part of that had gone astray. A professor? Nah, too snooty, too posh. Most likely might have been a mechanic or engineer of some sort. Probably not as obsessed with bombs, but definitely still would have admired them. 

Not long after, he got up and did his nightly ritual before bed, absorbed in his own thoughts that he was used to wrestling with for years, but tonight was...different. 

An actual voice finally pierced the air, pulling him back into reality as it grated against his ears. 

“What are ya gonna miss about me, Roadie?”

Junkrat was tinkering away at something, probably another cherry bomb if he were to guess. Roadhog was getting ready to hop into his bed and hadn’t been paying much attention to him the past few minutes, so he figured the kid was beginning to come out of his coffee induced trance finally. He wondered if it meant he was going to be sharing the bed tonight or if the other man was going to collapse wherever he was the moment he decided to finally give in to sleep. 

“Not much to miss, ‘Rat.”

“Fuck off, ‘m being serious here, mate. What if I died tomorrow? Right now even?” Junkrat pocketed the bomb and stood up and stretched before hobbling over to the bed to join him. Roadhog obliged by laying down and scooting over a bit in case his boss wanted to retire for the night as well, although he doubted it. The smaller man clambered up onto the bed which then turned into a task of getting onto Roadhog’s stomach, much to his bigger companion’s dismay as it meant cold metal digging into his skin, poking and pinching. Roadhog still helped him up and let him get in a comfortable position all the same. He wasn’t worried as much as he was curious about what Junkrat was on about. What went on in that brain of his? He always managed to come up with the weirdest, albeit interesting ideas and questions. It amused and awed him at the same time. “What would you miss about me? Be honest.”

Roadhog didn’t mean to take too long to think about it, but he did, and Junkrat looked genuinely offended. 

“Okay, I see where we stand then. Everyone carks it at some point, why not me tomorrow?”

Roadhog tensed up. “What’s so special about tomorrow?”

Junkrat slid off of him in a huff, intending to return to his work. “I dunno, I’m tryin’ to make a point!”

“Which is?”

His charge swiveled around swiftly on his peg leg and stomped his foot down soon as he faced him, putting his hands on his hips. “You’re my best mate, am I yers?”

Roadhog snorted, but quickly nodded as he knew Junkrat seemed to be having some sort of personal crisis going on, and he didn’t want to make it worse. And it was the truth, this man was the closest thing he had to a best friend in a long time, and admittedly, he would miss a lot about him if the worst were to happen. More than a lot, actually.

“Don’t you come the raw prawn with me, mate.” 

“Yeah, I’d miss you, ‘Rat.” 

Junkrat shrugged and pulled out his cherry bomb and screwdriver. “Guess that’s good enough.”

Good enough. Roadhog sat up and tried to figure out what to do because he knew he had accidentally upset him, and he knew his response was something the other was going to dwell on because Junkrat began to withdraw back to his work, needing a distraction to keep him from showing how upset he truly was. 

He heaved himself up from the bed and lumbered over to the work station, gently placing a hand on his partner’s back while carefully pushing Junkrat’s stuff down onto the table in a firm manner.

“Oi, I’m workin’ ya fat oaf, leave me be!” Junkrat tried to shove him away, but Roadhog wasn’t having any of it, instead choosing to turn off the lights to get the point across. 

“C’mon. Bed time.”

“What are you, my dad?”

“No.”

“Aw, but Daddy-”

“Jamison, for the love of anything, stop that shit and let’s go.”

“Make me.”

Roadhog was so close to just belting that pouty, smug look off his face. He settled for picking the other up swiftly and covering up that awful mouth with his hand, muffling his protests and putting up with the pathetic punches and kicks. When they got to the bed, he plopped down onto his back, holding Junkrat so that they laid stomach to stomach when he let go. Finally noticing that his bodyguard wasn’t in the mood to do anything other than sleep, Junkrat begrudgingly gave in and began to take off his prosthetics, throwing them carelessly to the floor, the sound of the heavy metal clinking on the ground making Roadhog wince a bit. 

“Need a massage tonight?”

“Nah, not right now.”

“Okay. Let me know.”

Time ticked by and Junkrat restlessly tried to settled down, fidgeting and trying all sorts of positions to get comfortable. Did he want to be lying on top of Roadhog? No. Spoon? It was nice for a few minutes, but nah, no spooning either. Back on top? Eh. Not quite. Jetpack for Roadhog? Yes! But...no, that wasn’t right either. Back to back? Warm, but he didn’t want to be facing the wall. So he slowly got back on top of Roadhog and curled up as best he could, motioning for the other to wrap his arm around him. 

“I’d miss you, Jamie.”

“Yeah?” Junkrat rolled over as best he could and rested his head in the crook of his arms, interest piqued. “And what about me would you miss?”

“Your laugh.”

“Ha! That’s a joke right? It’s a good one, I’ll give ya that.”

“And your voice.”

Junkrat’s eyes narrowed and his grin began to melt into a sneer. “No, seriously-”

“Seriously,” Roadhog nodded solemnly. “It means you’re alive.”

The smaller man stilled, eyes growing wide, his mouth hanging open slightly in surprise. Roadhog felt the need to run a hand over his head to reassure him, so he did. 

“I would miss the smell of you even if you smell like shit most of the time,” he continued. “I’d miss your cooking and the way you walk into a room and just announce yourself like you’re the most important person there no matter what the occasion is. You do the strangest things.”

He got a beaming smile in return, a look of genuine gratitude plastered on the younger man’s face made his lips turn up slightly under his mask in amusement. “Aw, thanks Roadie!”

“…”

“Wha’d’ya mean that last bit wasn’t a compliment!” 

“…”

“Well? Anything else?”

“Tons,” Roadhog said, moving slightly to link up his mask with the tanks. “You make me happy and I’d miss you plenty. So don’t die, tomorrow or otherwise, idiot.”

“Now that’s askin’ a lot from someone that deals with deadly chemical combinations on the daily.”

“Absolutely.”

Junkrat hummed a happy tune as he settled back down and perked up again just when Roadhog closed his eyes. 

“Alright, well, you never asked, but I’m gonna tell you what I would miss about you.”

“Okay, boss.”

“Having you call me boss, for one thing.” Junkrat laid back down, putting his hand and stump underneath his chin, a small wistful smile turning huge in an instant. “Hearing your deep voice and that wonderful laugh of yers, I’m so happy that I get to squeeze it out of ya from time to time. It’s like I’m the luckiest bloke in the world, getting the world’s grouchiest old man to crack up. Well, when you’re not killing something, let’s put it that way.” 

Roadhog hummed in agreement, absentmindedly rubbing Junkrat’s back to try and get him to calm down. He was still shaky from all the caffeine he had and it was slightly annoying to someone who was pretty invested in knocking out for seven hours, but a small voice in the back of his head told him to just...wait it out.

Junkrat held up his fingers, counting off more reasons, while Roadhog settled down finally and listened. Maybe that’s all Junkrat needed right now, someone to listen to him ramble on. It was almost always the case, but he knew the other needed it now more than ever. Something was up with him and they’d get to it sooner or later. “I’d miss yer jokes and stories and the way you look at those li’l pachimari thingies, and how you insisted we rob almost all the ice cream trucks we saw on the streets and how you came up with invading the arcade center to get some of those li’l bastards to add to yer bloody adorable collection. Oh, reminding me of stuff ‘cause without you half of these plans would have been flops! Maybe more than half. Or all of them. Take yer pick. Erm...oh, and your thoughtfulness, you’re always so quiet and yet you always manage to say the most when ya do open yer mouth. Oi, speaking of mouths, yers does wonders-”

“Shut it.”

“Right, got it,” Junkrat snickered and winked. “Shy tonight, are we?”

“Tired.”

“Roight. Got it.”

Quiet. Junkrat’s hand traced patterns on his skin before his index finger jammed itself onto the snout of Roadhog’s nose, getting a weak warning grunt in response.

“I’d miss that smile of yers. ‘s always good to see it when you take off yer mask, like you’re just...beautiful. And don’t get me started on the way yer arms and hands work, wow, you were blessed with the most wonderful arms I’ve ever seen, good on ya, mate,” his hand began to caress the rippling muscles of Roadhog’s arm that was lying on top of him. It was a nice feeling and Roadhog hummed again in thanks. “Oh, and yer grunts and threats and the way ya hook people, that really gets me going! The way you kill people with any means necessary, especially when it’s for me! Anything you do for me, I’d miss.”

“It’s my job to keep you safe, ‘Rat.”

“Yeah,” Junkrat sighed dreamily. “I’d also miss yer girth-”

“Enough,” he groaned, exasperated. 

“Not like that, ya pig.” Junkrat slapped his chest lightly. “Although, yes like that, but...just look at you, you’re huge! In such a good way! Built like a proper brick shit house! I’d miss having you as a body shield, you’re great for that by the way, and ‘s a good thing you got yer magic hog juice, otherwise I’d be employing some other drongo, and that would be bad in itself because they wouldn’t be you. You have any idea how hard it is to find a bloke that’s taller than me and physically imposing? I mean, there’s a couple in Junkertown that could rival ya, but they’re not like you. They’re not you, they’re not...Roadhog.”

With that, Roadhog definitely knew something was wrong and he lifted himself so that he was sitting back on his elbows. Junkrat kind of slid into his lap with little enthusiasm and his usual cheery demeanor had weakened; the shakiness about him took on a different kind of energy. “‘Rat, what’s going on?”

“Nothin’. Just thinking too much, I guess,” the anxious giggle was cut short by a hitch that he just barely heard. “I could die at any point, you could die at any point, I’d miss ya, is all.”

Roadhog barely caught a glance at the pained expression on Junkrat’s face before he buried it in the crook of his arms and it wasn’t long before he was trembling, a sure warning sign that he was about to cry. Roadhog could already feel the wet tears starting to drip onto his stomach and he gingerly lifted his charge’s head to tilt his chin up towards him. Junkrat didn’t make eye contact, but he had an embarrassed smile on his face as he tried to laugh it off. 

“Everythin’ good in me life has either died or was taken from me and it’s usually my fault. Now I’ve got a treasure worth more than I ever will be and a true friend that eats bullets for brekkie and it feels like a tickin’ time bomb before it’s all taken from me again,” he ran his flesh hand under his nose as he sniffed, feeling snot come off with it. Roadhog just let him wipe it where ever he wanted, this was not the time to be yelling at him over something as insignificant as that when his partner was on the verge of a breakdown. “What if I died tomorrow, Roadhog? Wouldn’t that be better than losing you?”

The kind of comfort he needed was something that Roadhog was still learning with him, but it felt right to heave up Junkrat back onto his stomach proper as he laid back down and hugged him as tight as he could. It made the other choke and cough in response, but it seemed to have done the trick. His partner was taking slower breaths, trying to match their breathing together. 

“If you died tomorrow, I’d never forgive myself. I’ve lost too much, too, Jamison.”

“Don’t leave me, Roadhog,” his voice was soft, but firm. He listened to the bigger man’s heartbeats. It helped ground him during times like these and it felt nice being close to him like this. 

“Don’t plan on it. Yet.”

“Good,” he snorted. He felt like he was getting more of himself back again. “And you realize that you’re out of a job if you die.”

“Don’t know if I would care.”

“But if you could care, would you?”

“...Go to sleep, ‘Rat.”

“You’d probably care a ton, probably enough to come back to life and beg me to rehire you. Ha! Downright pathetic, mate. I can imagine it already, you arriving in hell and realizing that you’re dead. Then, through sheer determination of absolutely missing me, you’d make a deal with the devil, come back, hunt me down with that hook of yers, reel me in with yer powerful arms and present yerself all nice and laid out like a-”

“Jamison, please-”

“See? What’d I say? Already practicing sayin’ my name, and I’m tellin’ ya right now, it would be a no go, I ain’t hiring ya, not with a filthy attitude like that. Crikey, Roadhog, you better work on that, ya dumb lug. Whatever, just go to sleep, would ya? Some of us are tryin’ to get some shut eye.”

Roadhog rolled his eyes and just squeezed him tightly, sighing at the content noise Junkrat made. Nights like this made him wonder what life would have been like without the explosion, but he knew for sure it wouldn’t have had Junkrat in it, and while he wasn’t sure how exactly he felt about it, he was grateful to care for a man that cared just as much as he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot has happened since I last updated in the Overwatch Universe dAMN 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	17. The Killing Lights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's killing time again  
> Put on your face and let's pretend  
> These killing lights won't kill us all again
> 
> -The Killing Lights by AFI
> 
> This one is about impulse control  
> And how the Junkers need to be with each other Or Else™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I...still don't know what he means by killing lights................

The time was barely 6AM and there was already a shouting match happening in the main break room of the Overwatch base. Those that could sleep through it were lucky; those that were woken up by the shrill voice that rose and fell with wild emotion and cracked occasionally were in for a long day that hadn’t yet begun. A few of the smarter ones put a pillow over their head to try and block out the ruckus at the very least. 

“We’re a team, you can’t separate us, it won’t work! Anywhere I go, he goes, anywhere he goes, I go!” 

“This mission doesn’t call for high damage or crowd control, therefore you’re going to need to sit this one out, kid. No more arguing, we’re expected to be there in two hours for briefing.”

“Why can’t I go?” came the high pitched, whining question from the second tallest man in the room, shoulders slumping in dejection as he finally realized he was going to get nowhere in this fight after all. About 95% of the people there rolled their eyes, or at least attempted to. It was too damn early to really care and most weren’t even finished with their coffee yet to be even close to coherent status. 

“It’s just not the mission for you, Fawkes,” Soldier 76, also known as Jack Morrison, drank the last of his cup of black coffee and placed the mug in the sink, a visual sign for everyone else that the decision was final and that the argument had gone on for far too long. Most of the other Overwatch agents got the message and left, but their recent recruit seemed to have a hard time understanding the social cues around here. Didn’t help the Junkers hadn’t adjusted yet to the time difference either. 

“I resent the use of my name is that tone of voice!” Junkrat hissed, stalking up to the man with every intention of intimidating him one last time. 

Captain Ana Amari cleared her throat, also finishing up her cup of tea. “Mako, could you please-”

“Oh! Since when are you on a first name basis with these Overwatch hoons?” Junkrat swiftly turned around to face his bodyguard, a look of utter betrayal splashed across his face. “And since when was your name Mako? I thought it was...s-something else that starts with a M!”

“Jamison, please respect the order to stay on the base,” Ana stood up and gently gripped his left arm to get his attention. He jolted at the touch and she caught a hint of disgust wash over him before he tried to cover it up with a grimace. He might not understand his place here yet fully, but he knew enough to not cross her. In due time he’d get used to taking orders and maybe they’d make a hero out of him, one that would be willing to put others first before himself. It was...wishful thinking. “It will only be for a couple of days while we gather intelligence on the attack, and then you can help us plan our next move. I’m sure we’ll need your skill by then. Besides, time spent arguing here only means he comes back later, and you don’t want that, do you?”

“But I should go with you now! I reckon I can make people talk, it’s easy, anyone can turn into a dobber when you threaten ‘em with a good bomb-er, time. I meant time!” He shrugged her away and crossed his arms, seeming more and more like a child than a grown adult. They were all pretty much astounded by Mako’s patience at this point. Morrison had already threatened Junkrat’s life multiple times due to him not understanding when it was appropriate to speak or when he was needed for his demolition expertise. He would have gladly followed through one time if Ana and Mako hadn’t stepped in when they had. That had only been yesterday, so things were still pretty fresh.

“Fawkes, with your methods we’ll be lucky if they even have a mouth when you’re through with them.”

“You make it sound like I’m some kind of nasty perve,” he offered Morrison a cheeky grin, but the stern look didn’t budge from the old soldier’s face. “Huh, nothin’ but a bunch of cranky ol’ diggers ‘round here, ay Roadie?” 

The grunt in reply made his awful smile grow even more and Ana just sighed, turning to leave for the carrier while Morrison gave them one last firm, non-vocal warning with his eyes. 

“Should probably listen to ‘em, ‘Rat,” Roadhog tried to ease the tension still in the room, not for Morrison’s sake, but for their own. Overwatch didn’t exactly have them in a tight spot, and he supposed they were free to go whenever, but Overwatch was providing them with brief protection from the various governments that wanted them to pay for their world wide heist spree. That and they were still trying to figure out a way to get back home. It was going to be difficult, to say the least. Knowing Junkrat though, he’d figure something ridiculous enough to work. 

“Hog, I’m not about to chuck a sickie, I’m in perfect working order-”

“Someone get Ziegler, Fawkes might throw up,” Morrison yelled down the hallway. Roadhog caught the edges of the man’s lip turn up in amusement, and he knew exactly what the other was doing. 

“No, that’s not what that means!”

“Did someone call for me?” their team medic peered in inquisitively, obviously having been close enough to have heard Morrison while rushing to the carrier. Morrison pointed to Junkrat and she quickly approached him, just barely registering in time that she needed clearance from Roadhog before she could get any closer, and she breathed in relief when he nodded.

“Oh for heaven’s-It means I’m not about to just sit this one out when I’ve got no reason to!”

“Jamison, you’re feeling sick, that’s reason enough,” Angela brought the back of her hand to Junkrat’s forehead with little hesitation, even when she knew he was going to violently slap her hand away. He wasn’t the first uncooperative patient she had, and he certainly wasn’t going to the last. Still, he did make even the easiest of things rather difficult. She tried again and was surprised that he only grabbed her wrist and pushed her back, careful not to push her too hard, despite how frantic he seemed to be getting.

“I ain’t sick! I ain’t stayin’ here, I ain’t leavin’ him, I need him, he needs me, what if-”

Before things got too out of hand, Roadhog grabbed Junkrat’s shoulders tightly in a warning grip, thumbs pushing underneath his shoulder blades. Usually that would get him to stop squirming as the sensation was calming and eased tension in his system, but it ended up working too well. His knees buckled and he let out a content, yet odd sounding moan that made Angela back away. Even Morrison cocked his head. 

“So he does have some sort of an off switch.”

Angela just glanced quickly at Jack, who nodded an okay, and she turned to leave, unsure if she was needed anymore, or even needed to begin with. 

“Just...drink some water and get plenty of rest, okay? You should be...fine. ”

Once she was out of view, Roadhog let his partner go, stifling a laugh when he almost slumped to the floor without the support. Annoyed, Junkrat turned around again, his mouth opening to form words, but he knew enough was enough by this point. 

“Stay here.”

“But Roadie, what if-”

“No. I’ll be back.”

“You expect me to sit here and catch up on footie while you go off and have fun without me? Who do you think you are?”

“Working.”

“Oi, _I’m_ yer employer-”

“Jamison,” He huffed. “Enough.”

Junkrat narrowed his eyes but stopped talking, moving aside so that Roadhog could get by him. It sucked. He could feel those eyes boring into him with resentment and jealousy. It wouldn’t last long though, he’d be back in no time before the runt missed him too much. One voice in him wanted Junkrat to keep fighting against the decision and get Morrison to cave, but another voice, the one that was usually more reasonable, knew that it was safer for both of them if they were apart this time. Just this once though. 

“He’s gonna destroy the place while I’m gone,” he stated matter-of-factly to Morrison as he passed him, and he could almost feel the heat in the air rise as the old soldier began to boil with even more anger and frustration. “No sense of self control whatsoever.”

“You got that right, ya big lug!” his young partner barreled past him as quickly as he could, knocking over some equipment and other people as he made his way back to their room, presumably to get started on some mayhem. 

“You’ll pay for that,” Morrison grumbled, feeling the need for more coffee grow more intense each passing second he knew that Junkrat was left unsupervised. “If I hear that any part of this facility or personnel was damaged in any way, shape, or form, I’ll have both of you sent back to the high security prison cells we found you rotting in. Understood?”

Roadhog shrugged and lumbered along side him as he was led to the carrier. “You should have let him come then if you’re so worried. We would have broken out in a couple of days, you happened to show up in time.”

“Just remember, Rutledge, you need Overwatch to keep you two safe from actual consequences for your recent and past actions,” Morrison snapped, picking up the pace. “Overwatch doesn’t need you two for long after you’ve helped complete this mission.”

“Thought you were trying to keep Talon from getting to us. Not like we haven’t had an offer from them.” Not like they hadn’t worked with some of their agents before, remembering Dorado. He kept that to himself though.

“Talon wouldn’t want you either. You two are reckless. Careless. A danger to everyone in the world, can’t be controlled. No. Talon needs discipline, and while they have the technology to make people bend to their will, I can see you two blowing everything they’ve tried to build without even trying. Talon wouldn’t want you thugs.”

Mako raised an eyebrow under his mask, amused. “But you trust us with Overwatch?”

“No. I trust you to try and fuck us over.”

“Hm.”

“Now sit down and get ready. The people we’re after don’t exactly like pigs.”

“No one likes police.”

Morrison glared and was about to say something more when Ana touched his arm. They appeared to have a silent conversation that made him stand down, but Roadhog knew he was still on thin ice with this man. 

He had every intention of breaking it. 

_____________

After the debriefing and stalking around the area for three days, Roadhog found himself entering a room with guns pointed at him, and he did what he did best: break bodies to get them to stop pointing at him. Half of the time while doing so, he heard the ghost of Junkrat’s laughter trailing him, excitement climbing higher and higher with each punch, always expecting some sort of quip or clever one liner that never came. It wasn’t like he missed it, he was enjoying the silence plenty, but it was off putting. Definitely unwelcome. 

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, he supposed, punching through someone’s chest cavity. Or maybe just a lack of proper body armor. 

With bodies strewn about, he remembered that he was supposed to be looking for witnesses or the suspects themselves, and because this was an area of high suspicion and crime, he was told that it was going to be hard to distinguish between either of the two, especially since no one liked ratting others out. Typical. He was used to this kind of landscape.

He radioed in his location and heard a couple of moans coming from people that hadn’t quite bitten the dust yet. He thought about finishing the job, but realized that if Morrison came in and found him like that, covered in even more blood and buckshot, he’d be in trouble for sure. Not that he cared that much, but he did want to get back to the base as quickly as possible, that was for sure. He had a partner that was probably worried sick over him for being gone this long. The feeling was mutual. 

“Hey.”

A man had propped himself up against the wall and was bleeding from a gash in his head and cut on his torso. His weapon was on the ground and he was mostly trying to stay awake it seemed. He chose to intimidate the man into submission by looming over him before he tried anything, if he was even able to.

“You’re part of that J-Junker duo that’s been on the news, r-right?” 

Roadhog didn’t answer. Merely stared down at the individual and wondered if he should get him to shut up with his fist.

“What’s’er name? Ro...Road’og, righ’?” He was slurring his words, eyes a little unfocused. He dragged himself upwards until he was standing and took a few uncertain steps towards him, not really able to find his balance and needing to lean against the wall to keep his bearings. 

Again, Roadhog refused to answer. Just waited for the sound of approaching footsteps to fill in the gap where there would be talking coming from Junkrat, who would be more than happy to engage the man in conversation before killing him. 

“You’re a fat fuck, y’know that?” he seemed to be coming to finally. Like talking was making things clearer for him as he tried to shake off the likely concussion he sustained in the earlier fight. “Like...humongous, inna not-so good way. Fat. Pathetic. Sad.”

He wasn’t going to take the bait. He knew it was bait, he knew the guy wanted a reaction, he knew that Junkrat would usually be the one to pick these battles for him even when he didn’t want him to-

“Hey! Pig face! ‘m talkin’ t’ya! You come in here, swingin’ those giantic fists around and kill my most of my friends and then what?” The man stumbled as he tried to reach for his gun that he couldn’t seem to locate correctly. Definitely concussed. “You gonna eat us? ‘s that why they refer to you as some sorta animal? Like some obese, useless, stupid boar that-”

The hook came out of nowhere and the man was quickly caught in Roadhog’s clutches, all the breath forced out of his chest. He was trembling, regretting saying anything and began to plead. 

Roadhog was having none of it. The man began to scream instead as he was slowly crushed in his bare hands.

“Rutledge? Heard your call, you in there?” It was Morrison. He better hurry up-

“Rutledge!” Morrison burst into the room, finally hearing the man, whose screaming was mostly pained squeaks, and ran up to them, jabbing the handle of his gun into the big guy’s bicep with full force, but it didn’t seem to make much of an impact. Instead it seemed to make things worse as Roadhog’s reflex was to squeeze the man tighter, which created a very disturbing and alarming sound come from the poor victim. 

“What is wrong with you? Stand down and release him, we need him for questioning! That’s an order!”

“Oh, is that so?” Roadhog laughed and only squeezed the man tighter still, making his face turn a slight shade of purple and it looked like his eyes were on the verge of popping out of their sockets. “Then squeal for me.”

The man couldn’t breathe and the life was fading from him, fast. It was a rush like no other, taking the life of someone that had no appreciation for it. 

“Rutledge!” In a last ditch effort, Morrison let off a couple of shots into Roadhog’s arm and he at last let go. The poor victim crumpled to the ground and tried to suck in as much air as he could, but it was obvious that his ribs were either horrifically bruised or broken. It was an awful sound and for a moment he felt empathy because he knew all too well what it was like to want to tear open your own throat and chest cavity just to get some oxygen. Angela immediately flew over to administer on the spot treatment and by using some of her healing technology, brought him back from the brink of death. When it seemed like he could stand on his own, Morrison quickly slapped on cuffs and turned to face Roadhog, who was nursing his wound, deeming it not harsh enough to want to use his hogdrogen if Mercy was willing to treat him also. Junkrat was sure to fret in his own way though. He always did. 

“What the hell was that?”

“You needed him to talk, I was going to get him to talk.”

“He was going to die!” Morrison raised his voice and it made Angela flinch and shrink down. Behind his mask Roadhog winced felt a tinge of regret, but was too proud to admit his mistake. Without Junkrat here with him, it was hard to concentrate on what needed to get done, although to be fair, the runt would probably have been egging him on. “Doubt he’ll be cooperating with us any further. Thanks to your behavior, there won’t be a next time like this. You’re back on probation.”

Roadhog couldn’t help but snort, it was just too formal as usual. He hated it. “As you wish, Morrison.”

“That’s ‘sir’ to you.”

That made him throw his head back as he laughed, clutching his belly, fully expecting the sound of a high pitched cackle to accompany his. But it didn’t and it brought him back to reality. Roadhog grunted and prepared for the trip back to the carrier, which involved gathering up the survivors and handcuffing them when Angela decided that they were good to go. She gave Roadhog a wide berth the entire time, unable to look in his general direction even. He felt...awful. She didn’t deserve to see this, even though he was sure she had seen worse. Still, she wasn’t a Junker and she wasn’t a violent person to begin with. He hoped he hadn’t made things worse for him and Junkrat. 

Finally, he trudged on over to the carrier, ignoring questions and just silently took on guard duty that Ana assigned him when the prisoners were loaded on. The man he almost killed refused to look him in the eye the entire trip back to the base and the others were too wary to keep their eyes off of him, afraid they might receive the same treatment even if it was frowned upon by the others. He was used to this kind of thing, but it felt way different this time. Probably had to do with knowing that he was representing the new Overwatch. Didn’t matter now, the damage was done and he’d deal with the consequences just like any other time. 

_____________

Back on the base he was greeted by Junkrat bounding over to him, enveloping him in a suffocating hug that was too affectionate for Roadhog’s taste in public after he had jumped up into his arms, and he was of course blabbering about his adventures while he was gone. 

“They bloody put me in a cell after day one, can you believe that? I only blew up the kitchen, not my fault they’ve got fancy cookware I ain’t used to. ‘s not like it’s a big deal, these folks can just go buy a new one-”

“You blew up the kitchen? Why weren’t we notified of his behavior?” Morrison began yelling at the closest people he could find to figure that situation out and Roadhog snorted, happy to see that the old man just couldn’t catch a break.

“So? How many blokes did ya pick up while you were out? Looks like you’ve been busy, eh? Naughty,” the giggling...he missed it more than he realized. He was getting looks from the other agents, not the mention the men they had captured for questioning, and he put Junkrat down as quickly and gently as he could, minding the prosthetics. “Clearly you did somethin’ right ‘cause that one looks a mess! You get hurt? Roadie, your arm-”

“I’m on probation. Looks like I won’t be going out again any time soon.”

“What?” Junkrat’s concern barely had time to show before it turned to anger and disbelief, with him shoving his finger roughly into the snout of his mask. “You go out on yer own one time and you muck everythin’ up? Bloody hell, mate, you-if I weren’t yer employer I’d-”

“‘Rat,” Roadhog gripped the back of his neck in a matter that seemed like a warning to everyone but them, and Junkrat basically melted and went completely gooey, having trouble standing up on his own like before he left, except this time Roadhog knew he wouldn’t be getting any odd sounds because he knew that Junkrat knew they had some serious catching up to do. “Shut up and go back to the room. Now.” 

“R-righto. Yeah, sure, right, okay, mate, whatever you say! Gotcha!” he squirmed his way out of his partner’s grasp and scampered off, leaving Roadhog alone again. Ana came by his side, touching his arm gently to get his attention. 

“We can take things from here, Mako. Thank you. I trust that you can tend to your wound on your own, so you’re free to go for now. You’ll be notified of when we begin the next phase of the mission," she was about to leave when she threw him a knowing smirk that took him off guard. "And of course he’ll be with you this time. I think Jack knows better now.”

He grunted in thanks and fought the urge to go run after his partner. It had been a long time since they had last been separated and he was just glad to be back in once piece.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time, no post! But here we are! This fic isn't dead, trust me, I'm just not writing as much cos of school and stuff
> 
> Thank you for reading, like always :v


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